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Hi all.

I just seen Tianyi's post in his own blog, about a spiritual attack... It sounds very freaky... Tianyi was suggesting that Pastor can preach about that... Anyway...

I was reading Galatians 5:22-23, about the fruits of the Spirit... In a nutshell,
-Love
-Joy
-Peace
-Patience
-Kindness
-Goodness
-Faithfulness
-Gentleness
-Self Control

In my cca meetings, we were planning a musical based on the theme "Censorship". Everyone were bringing their points forward such that they were accusing some people for receiving more attention compared to the others. Hatred and jealousy can be tasted in the air. I mean, from what Pastor mentioned two weeks ago during the YM session, he said something like when we are baptized by the Holy Spirit, the fruit of the Spirit should show (Correct me if I'm wrong).

I mean, seriously, my school is such that results matter only. Even the students form their own clicks. They form in that sense where popularity and results are the main thing... If not... BANG! You get shot from all directions without any avaliable cover. I'm gonna be very honest here. Before the month of September this year, I was like one of them. I enjoyed "killing" any people that threaten my position as "Powerful mastermind" in class. Most of my classmates fear me(not that I'm proud of it now...) because I used to radiate an aura of danger. Now, with the cca meetings make me think back about that time... God touched me during a YM session in the month of September, during one of the altar calls. He reminded me of the fruit of the Spirit and Christ's love for me. From then, I was changed. I enjoyed serving in the Music Ministry and I'm so glad that God would love a sinner like me... My "friends" noticed that I changed since I started spreading God's message around. I am very glad to say that one of my classmates, who used to scorn Christianity, is coming for the Transformers Camp!!

All I can say here is... I'm really glad God changed me... To God be the praise!

Signing off,
Yong Quan

P.S Can you all pray for my classmate who's coming for the camp? Pray that God can change his heart like He changed mine...

hey all.
on my latest post.
please do check my blog for it. its labelled.
I'll stand, with arms high and heart abandoned

& i'm leaving on a jet plane

ok! just before i leave for the...kiddie's camp thingy :/
i think i should post. so i'll be 'free'
and yes! i am super excited about youth's worship this week!
cuz. its exciting!

and this week hasn't been much spiritual stuff happening for me though.
cuz i've been basically surviving through the usual week of tuition.

But um yeah i've been doing my QT too :P
been reading some boook called street-wise spirituality
and there's this part about spirituality being a "connection" with God.
yea and i think like this week i haven't really 'connected' with God.

ok. but there was this time when i watched the united we stand bonus dvd
and it was SUPER COOOL! and i got goosebumps just thinking about how great God could make the hillsong youth grow, from 20 people to 10000000000 people.
yeah they said that in the documentary later on.

um yeah so thats my weeek..
oh we so have to get a smoke machine. like in the introduction of united we stand.
SO COOOL!

Fall In This Place

Hey all.

God touched me when I listened to this song... and I felt that I need to share this with all of you.

Fall In This Place

Verse 1

Take me to that place Lord

Where there's nothing else but me and You

Longing for Your presence

I know that You're calling me to You

Prechorus

Here I stand

And long for Your embrace

Nothing else

Could ever take Your place

Chorus

Come Holy Spirit

Fall in this place

I need more and more of You

Fill me again with the power of Your Spirit

Lord I'm crying out for more and more of You

I mean, for me personally, the Youth Ministry and God's revival fire comes to my mind when I listened to this song. So let us keep praying for the Youth Ministry!!

Oh yeah... P.S this song is from Pick It Up album by Planetshakers... If you really want details its the 4th song on the first disc

our God is an AWESOME GOD

hello!

i think i owe an entry haha. but i've been so lazy to actually type out what i've been learning, as i tried to tell tianyi last saturday.

anyway, what has happened the last 2 weeks? i think spiritually it has been down and up. 2 weekends ago i was feeling very discouraged because the youth carolling/Christmas event thing didn't materialise, and i was just feeling very lousy. thinking that hey i really wanna do something for God so why couldn't He have made things happen? but i think that experience taught me that a) i need to stop thinking i'm really capable because there're so many things that are out of my control. and b) that ministry requires PRAYER (more on that later).

another thing that compounded my misery that weekend was hearing all the talk about the parents being upset and all. i saw it coming a few weeks' ago because my mum talks to me about such things, and during that particular week i remember juls and i discussing the whole issue at much length. but i was still very troubled by it all, least of all because i don't really know how to react to it. what should my stand be? so yes i was feeling very troubled and discouraged.

but thankfully, God sent a close friend who listened me out and provided much food for thought, and i thank God :)

then last week was a lot of seeking God for guidance as to the song set. every time i lead worship i REALLY struggle with the issue of pride, so last week was no different. but thank God for His mercy in making everything good, even though prac was quite bad haha.

i think i've learnt a few lessons from all these experiences.

1) the importance of PRAYER. prayer has never been my strong point because i tend to get bored very easily, but these couple of weeks (especially saturday's prayer meeting before worship) taught me the importance of prayer. now i fully understand and believe in the saying, "No Prayer, No Power". and usually when i pray at home it's really half-hearted and quite short, but i think God's teaching me how to enjoy praying more. having a greater desire to spend time talking to Him, praying for others (i've realised that this helps me to want to pray more, somehow) and yeah just reading His Word too. QT has become more of a joy :)

2) that life isn't a bed of roses. sometimes i think that God should give me an easy week because if i'm on a spiritual high, i should be able to transcend everything right? but i think i've learnt, through all my busyness these few weeks, that it's not true. i can be physically and emotionally exhausted, but still spiritually strong. the nature of life IS that it is challenging and tiring at times, and God doesn't expect us to be perpetually joyful and on a spiritual high. what He DOES expect, though, is a willingness to always stick close to Him.

3) that KNOWING God's Word is extremely important. i was ticked off by my friend for not knowing my Bible properly, and that taught me how crucial it is that we check every single practice/teaching against the Bible. i dunno, this experience has made me realise how important it is to be spiritually discerning, and i really want to have that. also seeking to study the Bible more closely, but not sure how to do that at the moment (beyond doing it during cg etc.)

yup that's roughly it haha. you all can pray for my exams too! have been very busy with my theatre studies practical exam so i've hardly begun studying (SERIOUSLY) so yeah pray for good time management. :)

thanks!

Isaiah 29-30

Unlike previously where I shared that I was wasting my time away doing pointless activities (or nothing), things have really picked up since then. I have been learning quite a bit about God and am real excited to continue knowing more about Him =). (Reason why I have not penned down my thoughts here or updated the RAFT blog is because I am still trying to chew and digest many of the things I have read)

It's really been helpful thinking about God in a more intellectual sense as it has helped shape a few paradigms, aided me in coming up with what’s my stand on certain issues and allowed me to appreciate God more. (Reminder to self; let’s not get carried away with stimulating ourselves intellectually and forget about using our heart to feel and listen to God and vice-versa. I personally have neglected the deeper intellectual dimension for a quite while)

Anyway I shan’t bore you all those supposedly “more intellectual” thoughts (which very likely would seem rudimentary to you, the reader) with my inability to expresses such things concisely and with clarity. Hence I shall share some thoughts that apply more directly to my life.


Before I proceed with the actual sharing, let me note that something read from the bible that seems to have some link to what we may be experiencing does not equate to an exact interpretation / explanation of the current situation. Though are many times when God has used His word from the bible to deal with my ongoing situation head-on, we must always be wary of not interpreting the word to suit our circumstances despite our predilection to draw links between the two. We must always evaluate the word with minds, heart and most importantly the spirit as “his anointing (the spirit) teaches you (us) about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit – 1 John 2:27”. Having mulled over the word, I would like to make it clear that the bible passages (Isaiah 29-30) that I will be referring is something that God has used to teach and deal with me personally and by using these passages, I am not trying to imply that they represent the current state of affairs.

The reason why I must emphasize the above is because I will be using Isaiah 29-30 to relate to the small brouhaha in the Youth Ministry of recent, and what I feel God has impressed on my heart in all humility. The chapters taken from Isaiah talk about the time before the siege of Jerusalem by Sennacherib. Thus what I have been painstakingly trying to put across is that our YM is not under any siege by the parents and verses such as Isaiah 29:24 (“… those who complain will accept instruction.”) are not an allusion to them in any way. With that aside I hope I can now proceed with my sharing without causing any misunderstanding freely.

Amongst the many lessons I got out from these passages which I found so enriching, I shall take out 4 points.

Formalities
Isaiah 29:13 “The Lord says: “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men.”

Worship of God pertains to the whole spectrum of living our lives but for the sake of brevity I shall focus on the corporate worship session at church. I am the sort of person who believes (and still striving to be such a person) that when we worship, we should put all formalities and opinions of others around us aside; let’s lift our voices, dance, raise our hands, kneel, cry… whatever God inspires us to do as we use all of our heart, body soul and mind to reach out to Him.

My initial mindset usually relates “rules taught by men” as those sort worship sessions where some people feels it’s their obligation to give the very solemn (sometimes pained and glum) look, remain very still as if they were part of a marching contingent, etc. Just to clarify, I am not trying to criticize such worships; I truly believe that God looks at the heart above all.

But on the flip-side, could our “rules taught by men” now be the raising of hands, jumping etc.? Do we think to ourselves, “Oh the music is starting to build up; time to start raising hands” or “This is the sort of song where everyone jumps so I ought to join in”? Our outwardly exuberant appearances and postures of worship are of no significance if our “hearts are far from” God.

Moreover, this more visible expression of worship could be a greater stumbling block to others. Imagine if our friends/parents see us worshipping God with all these outward expressions but do not see the change in our hearts when we leave the worship hall. I am sure that would cause a lot of doubts to fill their minds vis-à-vis our reasons for worshipping in such a manner, hence giving some parents an added reason to speculate and raise concerns.

In a rather crude way of putting it across, I sometimes would rather people look as if they were mannequins if their attitudes for worshipping were wrong and if they do not let their experience with God transform their lives lest outsides conclude that God was not working through the lives of others who were worshipping God with all their might.

This being said, I also hope the contrary does not happen where people think, “My life is such a mess, I am not worthy to give my all in worship to God today or else others may think I am a hypocrite.” Do not be discouraged if you do not find yourself turning into a saint after the worship session. Instead, having examined our hearts, let us endeavor to give everything we have to Him in worship despite how distant we may seem from God. Allow the Holy Spirit to convict and empower us to change our lives. I believe that there will definitely be a change in one’s life if we continually do so, if not, let’s re-examine our lives.

Just as we worship in song with all our might, live the life He wants us to live with all our might.

(Due to time constraints, I think I shall stop here for now. I hope what was written did not come out as gibberish. And if there any parts inappropriate I should remove please do tell me. Thanks.)

Pray! :)

ok... it's so typical right? things start out vibrantly at first and then it begins to die down. i think shu may owes one now. someone pls remind her :P

but anyway, i'm actually supposed to be studying for my exams but i got a bit bored so thought to share how youth was like for me yesterday.

as i was telling darf during the morning prayer, i was quite apprehensive about the service coz err, i'm the pessimistic type. haha. but ya, i felt quite unsettled about it in the morning. was praying before prac but still had no peace but that's maybe also coz i dramatise things too much in my mind and i imagine the worse. i was afraid that things would go badly in that the tension between the parents and the ym would get worse and everything would go downhill. i was afraid that because of this, God would turn away from us and we'll be back to square zero again but thankfully, along the way, i felt better about things. haha. but yes. for me, service was quite incredible. when pastor told us to get on our knees, it really felt right and God's presence was so strong upon me then and it was at that moment when i was reminded again, that really, it's God who matters. ok la, coz actually, i was feeling quite bleah about a grade that i got for an essay. it really discouraged me coz i thought that this sem would be a really good sem grades-wise and the B will jeopardize those hopes for sure. ok. i know it sounds very silly but i'm quite a grade-oriented person and yeah, while on my knees, the thought just came to me, the B means nothing in light of Him. which is so true of course and ya la, i have to keep looking to Him for my studies and not depend on my own strength or wisdom and all that. He has wrought a greater miracle in the past when somehow, my B- for the CA got pulled up to B+ for the final grade. it is really incredible, especially since i really thought i wrote rubbish but yeah, God works. just must trust Him :)

and k la. a more trivial thing. basically, i'm not the sort to jump during worship. or anything for that matter. i think :P i don't the sensation of all the fats bobbing and somehow, i have no timing when i jump to music. i tried it before and i was quite out of time. haha. and i'll get tired very easily and i'll feel silly for starting but yesterday was incredible. it felt like His joy so filled my heart that i just had to and i did and it felt so liberating. plus, i didn't feel the super fats bobbing and i jumped to the timing and i didn't feel tired. in fact, it was so rejuvenating. so yeah. haha. so ya la, that's more like personal sharing.

but can pray for my exams!!! i have a paper this sat at 9 am which is why i won't be in church for prac but i'll come at about 11 plus after my paper la. it's called woman's reproductive health and well, i'm not good at science. it's mcq but i don't know if there's negative marking and yeah, can pray that i'll do well! :) i won't be greedy la. B+ and i'll be over the moon :)

oh. and yes, keep praying for the ym! and the parents and for revival to come! and for the camp too! :)

gosh ok i think like none of us have been following the 'fortnightly' rule. cuz i think we post almost once a weeek
ok. this week so far has been rather...relaxed..spiritually wise, it's been up & down.
some worrying stuff came up and its been rather bad... but then happy stuff happened too! so yeah.

and um. yeah currently some of the stuff that i've been thinking about.
is actually about the heart for God.

To me.. the heart for God is really something i long for. and i suppose everyone does too... And, i suppose that us, in the music min. need to have a heart for God at all times (duh). And not to be proud/narcissistic.

But what i've been thinking is that.. do I really have a heart for God..?
i mean like sometimes i can't really tell seriously.
And the thing that caused me to start thinking about this, was when Euclid told me

euclid said:tian yi, it was a heart of wanting to serve the Lord that now pleases Him, with the same heart offer it unto the Lord everyday and you shall have favour from heaven above.

um yeah so after that.. i thought to myself... do i really have a heart for God?
When i looked back at the initial reason for why i joined the music min... i was really confused.
My initial reason to join the music min was to.. kinda like make new friends in church. and was partly because i wanted to learn an instrument.

I doubt those reasons had something to do with God.
so yeah i'm kinda in a..questionable state right now i suppose. i mean.
I used to be the kind of boy that doesn't care about God.. and ever since i joined the music min. i met friends like Dan,nana,joel,min wei. ben etc etc.
then I started going for 2nd service.. and started opening my heart out to God during youth.

And now. after all the stuff that i've been through (gifts, annointings, Spiritual healings)
Sometimes i still ask myself if im practicing my drum parts so hard because i wanna please God.
or please the friends that i have.

so....yah i'm still pondering over that and asking God to change my heart. if it needs changing...

gosh i'm having such a hard time practicing 'break free' (goes off the practice)

at the cross

hi all,

i wanna share something that God has been reminding me recently: the cross of Christ.

i think that at times, we lose sight of what the cross means, we do not have adequate understanding of what it took for Jesus to die for us. u know at easter or good friday when they always show the excerpt from the 'Jesus' film where He's being crucified? and it's a gut wrenching 3 mins that i always turn my face from because i can't bear the sight of it and the anguish and all that? yeah. i think maybe that isn't very right, a refusal to be confronted with the violence He had to suffer on the cross just so i won't be so squeamish about it and yet at the same time, being desensitized to His saving work.

anyway, so i've been reading from 'my utmost for His highest,' great book, very uplifting but can be quite heavy going but anyway, some excerpts i wanna share since this guy writes really forcefully. the context is that God doesn't forgive us for our sins based on His great love. He forgives our sin based on the cross and the author calls us to meditate on the power of the cross, not the negate the price Jesus had to pay to reconcile us to God.

so yes, excerpts:

'But the conviction of sin by the Holy Spirit blots out every relationship on earth and makes us aware of only one- 'Against you, you only, have I sinned...' (psalm 51:4)... The great miracle of the grace of God is that He forgives sin, and it is in the death of Jesus Christ alone that enables the divine nature to forgive and remain true to itself in doing so. It is shallow nonsense to say that God forgives us because He is love. Once we have been convicted of sin, we will never say this again. The love of God is spelled out on the cross and nowhere else... Forgiveness doesn't merely mean that that i am saved from hell and have been made ready for heaven... Forgiveness means that i am forgiven into a newly created relationship which identifies me with God in Christ. The miracle of redemption is that God turns me, the unholy one, into the standard of himself, the Holy One. He does this by putting into me a new nature, the nature of Christ.' - Nov 19

'The only basis on which God can forgive us is the tremendous tragedy of the Cross of Christ. To base our forgiveness on any other ground is unconscious blasphemy. The only ground on which God can forgive our sin and reinstate us to His favour is through the cross of Christ. There is no other way! Forgiveness, which is so easy for us to accept, cost the agony at Calvary. We should never take the forgiveness of sin, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and take our sanctification in simple faith, and then forget the enormous cost to God that made it all of ours… Compared with the miracle of the forgiveness of sin, the experience of sanctification is small. Sanctification is simply the wonderful expression or evidence of the forgiveness of sins in a human life. But the thing that awakens the deepest fountain of gratitude in a human being is that God has forgiven his sin… Once you realise all that it cost God to forgive you, you will be held as in a vice, constrained by the love of God.' - Nov 20

no need to rush through what i've typed out... take time to ponder, reflect and ask God to give u a fresh understanding of the cross. during communion on sunday, i asked for that, i asked Him to help me imagine the sufferings on the cross for my sin and i was touched by His great sacrifice all over again. don't be afraid to reflect coz of fears that He will be waiting to deal with u about a particular sin or whatever. he disciplines because we are His children. be proud to be called His child.

On the RAFT blog

Hi,

I have sort of posted my spiritual update, dated 7 Nov 07 on the RAFT blog. There's other stuff to share but yep, shall see whether I have the time to do so. (Yes I do have things to do too for all you cynics out there =p!)

Some post...

Today is indeed a very gloomy evening. But no matter. So everyone is feeling fine? Any prayer requests anyone?

Yeah I just want to share about my classmate whom I mentioned in the post earlier. I talked to his parents about the Youth Camp today and his parents were positive about it! Praise God!!!!

Today I done a passage in Exodus 4:1-5. I feel that God is telling me in the passage that He will keep us from harm, but it is up to us to believe Him. Personally I feel that this passage is relevant to me as I got attacked spiritually in cyberspace. (Josh should know about this) Yeah I think that God will protect His people, like He protected the Israelites from attacks and other stuff. So we gotta rely on Him and trust that He will deliver us.

Another point I want to share is in 2 Kings 4:1-7. It is the part where Elisha helps a widow pay off her debts by everlasting oil. The widow asked her sons to get as many jars as they can find. In verse 5, however, the widow asked her sons to find more jars as she realised that there were still leftover oil. I think, from this passage, it says that God gives everlasting supplies. But if you limit your field of vision, God can only give you this much. Let me give an example. During a test on your dreaded subject (in my case, chinese), you are trusting God for great results. But, in the back of your mind you believe that "Hey, I suck at xxx subject. I trust God, yes, but... I trust he'll give me a pass at the most." then He will give you a pass, since you expected it. But if you entirely trust Him (work is still needed on this part) and your mindset is"Ok, God, I'll attempt xxx subject. I FULLY trust in You, for Your will be done, not mine." I believe God will give you what you desire. Of course it must co-incide with His will.

That's about all I gotta share... I'm feeling pretty weird... Anyway, have a goodnight sleep!!!

God bless everyone who read this,
Yong Quan