So Won't You Break Free †

now this is the story all about how, tianyi's life turned upside down.

2008-05-31T07:40:00.003+08:00

Yesterday God told me to let go of all my baggage.
and i believe, its true for most of the things/stuff that's been happening rather recently.

For the past 2 weeks i've been rather burdened with like a tremendous load of things, (studies/whos gonna replace me when im on duty/ etc)

and.. yeah honestly i haven't been doing qt.

like after i got back my results i think i just totally deviated from it.
And... yeah im hoping that in these last 2 weeks before i fly off, God will really bring me closer to him... before my life really turns upside down. or something like that.

another cool thing

2008-05-24T22:20:00.002+08:00

i led bs for my cg this week, the 'older' group and i had a lot of fun preparing for it coz it was a good time waiting on God, praying and even carefully thinking through the questions and reflecting upon how God has worked in my life and praising Him for such all over again. what was the greatest milestone in your christian walk? one that changed the way u saw God forever?

mine was when i was like 19? during that period for about a year, i felt very isolated and alone and i tried to fill that gap with shopping. i know, terrible right? haha. but yeah. i remember once when i came back on sunday evening with bags of clothes and what not and they just laid there in their glossy bags and that's when it became so clear to me that things of this world cannot satisfy. from then on, it was a bittersweet experience of looking to God for comfort and strength. i remember not being able to sleep at night, waking up at some weird hour at night and then reading the book of Isaiah. during my season of darkness, God's light shone bright for me and led me out. that was the time when i grew the most in God, when He was so much closer to me than anyone else. i knew from then on that there's no turning back from God. how can i turn back from the one who was there for me when no one else was and no one else could understand what i was feeling and going through? that period, on hindsight, was the best time of my life.

and yeah, can u say that there's no turning back on God for u from this time forth? if no, then why not? but if u want God to bring u to that point of i don't know how to put it, then just ask Him to deepen His relationship with u but hey, be prepared for what that could entail.

anyway, i deviate. the other cool thing i learnt about worship this week is that true worship involves a turning away from the ways and standards of this world. we cannot claim to be worshippers of God if we still have one leg in the ways of this world and what not. we cannot subscribe to the doctrines of this world and say that we are true worshippers of Christ. with God, things are pretty much white and black i think. it's only us who try to find excuses, muddy things up and say they're grey areas. if we really seek God and ask to know His standards, He will reveal, whether through His word or people or whatever.

so, which side are u on?

back from bangkok!

2008-05-16T10:57:00.002+08:00

hey guys,
just touched down last night. spent about 4 days and 3 nights there and it was a lot of shopping and food. we ate tom yum soup and phad thai and sticky rice till we nearly dropped. hee.
anyway, i'm thankful that i went on the trip coz it really made me disciplined about qt and i've been very blessed so i wanna share about that and some lessons i learnt from exodus about worship.

i felt so loved by God during the trip coz He opened my eyes to see Him working and answering my prayers. minor things like praying that we won't get cheated by cab drivers to more significant things like getting to know the other people on the trip better coz i went with my good friend and her church friends and it was a good learning experience too coz i saw how much they love each other and their friends and flock in church and the thing about how others will know that we are disciples of Christ when we love one another popped up for me very strongly. i enjoyed the quiet mornings spent in prayer and word whilst the others were sleeping too. it was very refreshing and not like most holidays where there's a get out by a certain time thing but a lot more free and easy.

so anyway, i've been reading exodus ever since sun coz i was inspired to read it after the mother's day message and i'm excited about the lessons i'm learning from it. from exodus 10:

25 But Moses said, "You must allow us to have sacrifices and burnt offerings to present to the LORD our God. 26 Our livestock too must go with us; not a hoof is to be left behind. We have to use some of them in worshiping the LORD our God, and until we get there we will not know what we are to use to worship the LORD."

this passage spoke to me coz it's about bringing our all to worship and being ready to sacrifice whatever He calls us to lay down. it's about faith too and having such a close walk with God that we hear immediately what He calls us to lay down. it's that readiness and trust that is essential when we approach God and i was just like wow. i wanna do that and be like that too.

ya la. let's keep praying for the ym too. it's a spiritual work and requires spiritual means.

2008-05-13T22:27:00.004+08:00

i think yesterday was one time where i learnt what true worship is.
its not about how you do it, or where, but more of why you do it. and how you respond to the things around you.

2 days ago, i had to run around my house neighbourhood in ...disgustingly disgusting shorts.
when i went out. i felt so crap like i just didn't feel like doing the daily jog.

and thats when God reminded me about true worship; why do you raise your hands in worship? Cuz the congregation does it? or cuz it looks cool? ( ok clearly it doesn't)
but how bout more of cuz we lift it to actually praise God? To have the actual close and personal worship that we share.

another time when i went jogging, God impressed upon me the decision i should actually have taken. and i believe will have to take sooner or later.

As some of you know, i may not be able to make it for worship pracs because i got a cca in the morning, thus the two commitments collide. And as i was asking God for help, to find out which way is the way he wishes for me to continue.
He gave me this sentence
" A true christian walks the narrow path, Many fall out of it into the wide one"
even though God didn't exactly answer my question. but i think he was talking about how easy it is for my to just lie and give a fake excuse just to skip band and go for prac.

which i sometimes have been doing. So... i guess that the direction he is kinda leading me into is to withdraw from the music min for a while.

Maybe. i don't really know yet.

"In Him I will put my trust"

2008-05-10T21:16:00.002+08:00

Really lazy to copy and paste the entire thing... Pls refer to my blog for the fortnight post

http://yqcabizpark.blogspot.com

Thanks,
Yong Quan

exams over

2008-05-01T12:27:00.002+08:00

hey guys,

yes, i'm the bad example that no one should follow coz i have not been blogging at all since err, i don't even dare to go back to check. haha. i'm very sorry. i had a crazy workload this semester and it was a lot of book reading, essay writing, tests, essay(S) re-writing (this was the ultimate horror) and then the rush to exams. i finished my last paper yesterday so yay! rejoice with me. haha.

yeah, because of my own mad school life, i haven't been focusing my energies and mind on youth music. that's my error/sin. tianyi suggested that we have a meeting next sun, 11 may so yeah, i'll send out agenda soon but it's mainly to catch up and pray coz there're so many things we need to commit to God together. the bassist crisis has been a real downer for me. i'll share more when i see everyone and hmm, i'm quite happy that now that the hols are here, i'll be able to focus my energies and time properly. i'll most probably ask u guys out for tea or something so pls don't break my heart and refuse me!!!! haha.

i concur with pastor completely about not being complacent coz for a while, i think i was praying about that too. i say i think coz i have zero memory now :P and yeah, i've been sorta asking God, how come there doesn't seem to be fruit in the ministry, particularly the ymm. like the musicians who serve. i pray for them that even if when they started playing, they didn't have a relationship with God then somehow through service, that relationship will start and somehow, it doesn't seem so. if anyone wants to disagree about this, please do. and then i struggle a lot with what 'kind' of people should be allowed to serve. i'm rambling and my grammar and syntax is all over the place. gahsh. ok la. i'll try to share my heart succinctly when we have the meeting.

but let's really persevere in praying for the ministry.

You hold my future in Your hands

2008-04-22T22:34:00.005+08:00

Honestly speaking... I keep missing the deadline for the posting... Here is my post now!

Anyway, two weeks ago, after youth service... I was listening to this song "I Need You" (posted below) and suddenly one of my schoolmates came into my mind. He is those kind of person which emmits a "go-away-or-regret-it" aura. He is pretty antisocial with his face stuck into a frown... I don't know what was happening but suddenly I had the urge to talk to him... although a big part of me did not want to... The thought just got thrown out of my mind and I continued on with life...

A few days later, another song struck me (also posted below) and I saw him again in my mind... [Request] Pls pray for me about this matter, 'cos it could be that God wants me to talk to him.

I don't know what's with me and songs but YET another one hit me just last Friday... Here are the lyrics

Saving Grace

I'm holding on to you
I'm never letting go
'Cause You have saved my soul
And You have made me whole

You took my brokeness
And filled me with Your joy

All I long to do is worship
All I long to do is bring You praise
For nothing compares to You
My Saving Grace

Jesus Saviour
My life belongs to You forever
'Cause You have set my heart on fire
And You have set me free

I just got struck in the face and got some cool resolution which I (quite stupidly, thinking about it later) shared in class the following day. My resolution? "To save my entire class" It was like one of the many desires in my heart... But after saying that, I felt rather stupid and lame as a thought came into my mind "Why don't you put your actions to where your heart is? Studies are more important! Why care about it?" (Summarised thoughts)

Spiritually dry now... But I believe that God is going to do something mighty in my school... He planted me there for a reason... since I tried getting out of my school last year and I FAILED!!!

Yeah... That is about all I got to share for today... Cheerio!

In God's mercy,
Yong Quan

P.S Songs are in my listening order...

2008-04-20T18:30:00.003+08:00

somehow. beautiful savior started playing on my itunes.
then i felt peaceful. and i sat there at my com just singing and worshipping God through all the music and stuff.

really awesome.
Nothing really to share. but then again... somehow i feel really close to God on Sunday afternoons. when everything seems so dreary.

EDIT/6.50PM

i dont know this is so awesome... as i was listening to the song 'devotion'
i felt this wave of 'thing' just impact on my face... then i just broke down. for like. 3 mins.
For no absolute reason.
once again, God showing his greatness during pre monday blues.
legendary

2008-04-10T15:42:00.002+08:00

was reading shumms post... and i thought may as well write this down before it escapes my mind
this happened last sunday on 5th april

So... as usual i was feeling all gloomy and sad la. pre monday blues.
Then i dunno why but i just picked up the book Joel lent me 'God Chasers' i think the title was.

So.. yeah after i read the book. i started crying for like no apparent reason?
uhh i lazy to write the whole experience again so can go to my blog... its
http://watchthis-space.livejournal.com
yups.
and i believe it was like.... so cool that Pastor A was also talking about like not being complacent a few weeks ago... and not to stop at this 'start of the revival' stage.

cuz like in chapt 3 of the book. they were talking about how it always feels good at the start (At Youth Camp 2007)
And then later on it gets boring (Now)
so like... i mean just strive on lah.. theres no point stopping now since we've worked so hard just to get this thing started.

oh yes and before i forget... it also talks about having the hunger and thirst for God. which somehow also kinda linked to the bible verse i was sharing during devotion...so.. yah la quite cool.
i guess that our Youth's Hunger for God hasn't really reached that stage of impact yet....
so... dunno.

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D: D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D (((:

"i have nothing to give"

2008-04-10T00:18:00.002+08:00

hello!! haha so sorry i've not blogged here in a really long time.

been quite busy with school and all, and spiritually okay i guess. i think one thing that is bad about being busy is that all the days seem to blur into one, and right now i'm finding it hard to remember what significant events have happened to me in the last month.

but here's a short sharing from my QT last night :)

“5Then he said to them, “Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, 6because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.’

7“Then the one inside answers, ‘Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’ 8I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man’s boldness[a] he will get up and give him as much as he needs. ” (Luke 11: 5-8)

“I have nothing for him to eat”. As we are aware of our inadequacies, intercession becomes the only hope and refuge. I may have knowledge, a loving heart, and be ready to give myself for those under my charge, but I cannot give them the bread of heaven. With all my love and zeal, still “I have nothing to set before him” (Luke 11:6, KJV).

my QT reading for the last couple of days have been about intercession, and the need to pray fervently, but i’ve been struggling to really understand and apply this truth to my life. and so last night when i read that i could finally identify with the motivation for intercession, especially after my faltering attempts to start caring more for my CG members. and beyond increasing our motivation to pray, i think a sense of inadequacy is also useful because it helps to keep us humble, which i find difficult sometimes. so yeah that was a pretty timely lesson for me :)

i guess all of us are probably going through a busybusy patch now, so i think we really need to pray more that as a music comm, we'll continue to be good spiritual examples for others. and perhaps a fresh touch from God? i dunno for me sometimes serving becomes very routine, just another saturday in church, so yeah that's not good i think.

haha okay enough rambling off to mug goodnight people! TAKE CARE :D

29th March YM Service

2008-03-29T22:58:00.005+08:00

Whoa... that is a long title... Anyway... Today's service really touched me, esp. during the worship...

About my past week... My school lost in the debate competition, my test are totally cashed and my blood pressure during the past week has enough power to drive a car from Singapore to KL... without any fuel, just raw power. My spiritual walk was also rather low, I just could not see God anywhere in my past week... I'm so not myself the past week...

In God's grace,
Yong Quan

2008-03-26T23:24:00.002+08:00

don't we ever wonder what it would be like to just live your life spreading the gospel of God, with no care in the world other than to preach his word?

have you ever felt like just giving up on your studies and just work for the church?

To Live is Christ but to Die is Gain
Philippians 1:21

(no title)

2008-03-16T04:19:00.003+08:00

I just realised that Planetshakers banned most of their videos on Youtube... Anyway...

This song hit me straight in the face, esp. the bridge. I dunno... it triggers me that God really loves us and that God can do everything! He can even change our lives with a drastic turn!

Anyway... the past 2 weeks was rather hectic. In the last week of school my class got a pop quiz for Chinese... a very nice "end-of-term" gift... and I was very discouraged by my debate competition on the 7th where my team lost by half-a-mark to Orchid Park Sec... God was very real to me the past week... I'm not sure how to explain it...

That's mainly it... See ya soon.

In God's grace,
Yong Quan

2008-03-14T20:04:00.002+08:00

k... needed to post again.

And i must say that...well it's been rather ok for the past few weeks i guess
nothing really bad or good has happened.

I guess i still need abit more of God in my life these days, with all the school stress and stuff.
other than that...my studies got a little better i guess
so yup.. not too bad

Doing Fine

2008-03-12T00:42:00.002+08:00

It's been a while since I've blogged. Have been rather bogged down with work, worship pracs (put in quite some effort for the Tony Anthony and BB services) and other stuff the past 2 week. When I do get sometime on my hands I'm usually too tired to do much - to the extent that today was the first time I went to the gym in 3 weeks. So when it comes to blogging the inertia is even more superb as you can probably deduce by the un-updated Youth blog.

But yep, despite the tiredness things have been going swell with God. Think the main thing that has encouraged and at the same time discouraged me is inviting the Teban youth for Youth. After some events that happened this year that high-lighted the fragility of life, I opine that I now feel more burdened to evangelize to the people around me than ever before.

Anyway, back to the Teban youths. Don't think I have been so direct and persistent in asking people to come down to church. I felt that I had to be politically correct and there was some unknown fear that hindered me from asking people come down. So when the Tony Anthony service was approaching I was starting to feel a little uneasy about asking the Teban youths. Would they dislike me if I asked them to go down to church? Would they reject me? (Ok, I know that by saying,"No" they aren't rejecting me but God but back then I didn't really like receiving negative replies)

But then I knew that there was Youth CG the coming Saturday and one of the discussion pointers sent in the e-mail was to ask the CG who they would be inviting. I thought to myself,"How can I ask my CG members to invite their friends if I myself don't lead by example?". This compounded with the whole "fragility of life" thing made me want to step out in faith and just ask.

Ok, it's getting late and I need to be at Teban at 7.30am so I shall summarize:

- I wanted to invite the Teban Youths personally
- I had a fever and was dying so I wrote notes to them
- They did not respond but I used that note as a talking pointing
- Other youths who did not get the note were curious why they didn't get it
- My courage began to grow and I asked them boldly
- I was surprised that they were very receptive
- A number said they would come but remained uncontactable
- 3 came (encouraged) the rest pang-seh (slightly discouraged)
- I don't find asking people down to church or talking about God as intimidating once I've tried
- I thank God that He placed me in TG and I believe He has used these Youths to teach me that inviting people to church and sharing your faith isn't that tough
- I'm now more burdened for my own personal friends
- I need to find time to pray, rebuild bridges, share God with these people

Cya @ Teban Kids Games tomorrow blokes...

passion and purity

2008-02-29T10:38:00.002+08:00

i have to say that i'm quite impressed that people remembered to post without me having to send a fierce email or whatever. definitely a refreshing change. haha.

but anyway, i'll just share something from my qt 2 days. i'm reading from that lent booklet thing we were given. i'm quite a few days behind the actual schedule but i don't think it really matters but anyway, the one i'll be sharing from is dated 22 feb. it's from exodus 16:9-21 (ESV).

9Then Moses said to Aaron, "Say to the whole congregation of the people of Israel, 'Come near before the LORD, for he has heard your grumbling.'" 10And as soon as Aaron spoke to the whole congregation of the people of Israel, they looked toward the wilderness, and behold, the glory of the LORD appeared in the cloud.
the thing that really touched my heart is that God is not slow to answer and it's incredible how even when we grumble, when others would draw away from us coz we're being so bad mood or whatever, God calls us to draw near to Him. even when we're grumbling against God, He calls us to draw near to Him.

11And the LORD said to Moses, 12"Ihave heard the grumbling of the people of Israel. Say to them, 'At twilight you shall eat meat, and in the morning you shall be filled with bread. Then you shall know that I am the LORD your God.'"

13In the evening quail came up and covered the camp, and in the morning dew lay around the camp.
and then He provides in abundance.

14And when the dew had gone up, there was on the face of the wilderness a fine, flake-like thing, fine as frost on the ground.
His provision is obvious. there's no need to search high or low for it. it's right in front of us. it's whether we recognise the provision or if we need, like the Israelites, Moses to point out God's provision for their physical hunger.

15When the people of Israel saw it, they said to one another, "What is it?" For they did not know what it was. And Moses said to them, "It is the bread that the LORD has given you to eat.
we need to be spiritually sensitive to His provision and blessings, to recognise them as God-given.

16This is what the LORD has commanded: 'Gather of it, each one of you, as much as he can eat. You shall each take an omer, according to the number of the persons that each of you has in his tent.'" 17And the people of Israel did so. They gathered, some more, some less. 18But when they measured it with an omer,whoever gathered much had nothing left over, and whoever gathered little had no lack. Each of them gathered as much as he could eat.
i think this bit is about how God is one of justice and fairness. maybe it links also to how He does not give us more than we can bear in terms of trials and such.

19And Moses said to them, "Let no one leave any of it over till the morning." 20But they did not listen to Moses. Some left part of it till the morning, and it bred worms and stank. And Moses was angry with them. 21Morning by morning they gathered it, each as much as he could eat; but when the sun grew hot, it melted.
i think this is the warning bit in the passage for me because it essentially speaks of disobedience, that regarding God's commands and a refusal to heed the words of a God-appointed leader. the manna bred worms and stank speaks about how when we disobey, it will be evident. maybe not immediately coz we can lead double lives or whatever but ultimately, it will show. why? because no fruits will be borne *(John 15:5-6, NIV).

5"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned.

and it's not just that the disobedience is manifest but it can also contaminate others around us. which is why it's so important for us, particularly those who serve in the ymm that we keep allowing God to search us and purify us and when we disobey , to quickly repent and return to God because it will affect our service. refer to Joshua 7 for Achan's sin and how that of 1 man's could affect the entire army of Israel and God's favour.

so the most important thing is that we must keep ourselves holy and humble, quick to respond to God's commands and to have soft hearts.

the time has come

2008-02-26T00:04:00.003+08:00

The time has come
To stand for all we believe in
So I for one am gonna give my praise to You
Jesus!

this post isn't going to be very lucid because this is all off-the-cuff, but here goes.

last couple of weeks were quite dry for me spiritually, but i thank God for speaking to me more clearly on saturday :) was really ministered to during the worship, and God showed me the "state of my heart". 1) that i've become too proud to WORK at my spiritual life, i.e. being satisfied with mediocre QT and sloppy prayers. 2) that i've been content with living on past mercies, or thoughts of how God was real to me in the past. so i was greatly challenged to seek God for a new revelation every single day, and not just be satisfied with the past. as it goes in lamentations 3, "His mercies are new every morning." i won't say that i'm completely out of the woods yet, but i thank God for refreshing me last saturday :)

i've been pretty stressed recently because had a lot of deadlines and stuff, so i've been having weird stomach aches (can pray for that). quite nervous about the 1march worship because prep has been so intense, and i'm just afraid that we'll end up too focussed on the technical details and not enough on God. so yeah i'm reminding myself that this is not cast in stone, God can still rearrange my set/do something else, so praying for spiritual sensitivity.

just like tian yi, i've also been having problems inviting friends for this saturday. was reminded during the message last saturday not to treat my non-Christian friends as simply a pool of people from which i pick a few to come for evangelistic events to make myself feel good, but really, i need to start making an effort to build a friendship with them. so far those i've invited have been quite non-commital about it, so i'm a little disappointed, but yeah still praying hard for them.

other than that, it is my holidays this week! hahaha so i'm pretty happy about that :D okay that's all ciao! :)

2008-02-25T20:12:00.001+08:00

sigh ok. i think i'll just share whatever i have on my mind la.

first off, was saturday...
i don't know why. but then halfway through the worship i was like. shucks la i dont really feel like i have the heart to drum anymore.

NOT that i'm indecisive in the place where i am serving now. but i just felt this feeling like i just needed to be alone and just not do anything at all.....

so yeah , i was actually hoping that the speaker wont ask the musicians to go up and play response song...cuz i really felt very displaced and frayed.

Like the passion for God inside of me was just extinguished.
And like whatever was going on inside of me was like. xian.....
But yeah im ok now i guess,after talking to some people, getting encouraged and all that.

another thing im really having trouble with is asking people to go for the tony anthony thing
I mean, its like in acs people don't really give a damn about what real christianity is lah.
To say the truth. acsI is just a neighbourhood school with lots of money.

so yeah...need a little help on that part. prayer will help alot.

and one more thing i just learnt today during my quiet time. is not to judge people.
quite cliche lah but i was actually feeling damn pissed like 1 hour ago.

so yeah im ok now lah.oh gosh my itunes is like playing all the fast songs now.... sigh
ok yeah thats all i have no lah i guess and i got 3 exams(hopefully 2) tomorrow. so yeah pray for me please if you read this by today or something(:

A Pure Heart

2008-02-24T23:55:00.000+08:00

Hi guys!

I finally remembered to post this time... Anyway...

Quite recently, my dad bought a magazine from the "Rock" Bookstore (@Suntec) and I was flipping through it the last week. This magazine is actually the NC (new century) version of the New Testament! What makes it even better is that it has slips of notes here and there for verse applications! This note struck me (kind of)... Here it goes.

Mark 7:20-22

In a nutshell, the notes reads that during Jesus' time, the spiritual leaders were concerned about outward stuff, such as sitting away from the unclean people while eating, do not eat with unclean hands etc. and they (spiritual leaders... I suppose its the Pharisees) get very jumpy when people does something wrong outwardly. Jesus mentioned the verse from Isaiah 29:13 to tell the Pharisees off. Actually, come to think about it, the only time when Jesus gets "rude" is when he talks to the Pharisees. (Cannot remember where but Jesus called them "a brood of vipers" once.)

In verse 20, Jesus mentioned that what comes out from within determines if a person is clean or unclean. Going on to verse 21-22, Jesus gives some examples about unclean things from within (Greed, murder, adultery etc.)

Personally, I think that these verses talks about how we need to have a pure heart. God forgives sins... almost every sin except denying that Jesus is our personal Lord and Saviour. A pure heart (to my opinion) is that you do not fill it with sinful thoughts, instead fill it with God's word.

I admit I don't have a pure heart... Most of the time the devil plants thoughts into my head and I entertain them. You know sometimes when you sin, you want to hide from God? I know I do. Sometimes when I know that I am sinning, but yet I let the devil coax me into doing it. After that, I am usually filled with guilt and I always run from God, thinking that He will be pissed with me and yell the crap out of me. But that is not what God is like. When we sin, we should RUN TO HIM INSTEAD OF RUNNING AWAY FROM HIM!!! When we run to God and tell him about it, He will help us out. Still, sometimes it is difficult, esp. when the devil planted the seed of that particular sin in your head and it grew into a sucking tree already.

I think the best way to conquer the devil is to pray and keep seeking God whenever the devil tries to plant the seed of sin in your head.

That is all I gotta say so far...

In God's grace,
Yong Quan

pressing in

2008-02-23T22:30:00.002+08:00

hey guys,

today's worship was quite a reminder for me in that like what pastor said, the call of God these few weeks have been to enter into His presence and ya, let's rem to pray for our ministry regarding this. pray by name if possible and yeah, for yourself too.

hmm. i think i had more to say but i can't rem now. haha. shumay is leading worship for the tony anthony service so let's pray for her too.

encourage

2008-02-12T18:08:00.000+08:00

hey guys,

hmmm. it sounds like we're all mainly going through a dry spot right now and well, sometimes i feel very burdened as a leader that i must encourage those who serve with me and build them up and stuff and i'm really thankful that today, i actually have something to say that's constructive and not meandering and all.

as those who went to church last sun should know, we all got this devotional book for lent and usually, i don't keep to these things coz i have my own way of doing devotion but coz the book looks so nice, i decided i will try to use it. it's think enough to leave in your bag and read on the bus and stuff. so anyway, i accidentally read the devotion for the second day yesterday but it really encouraged me and gave me hope coz it was mainly about God's compassion and somehow, i sensed that i should read lamentations and so i did and here's the part that i pray will lift your spirits too:

21 Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

22 Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

24 I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

26 it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

31 For men are not cast off
by the Lord forever.

32 Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
so great is his unfailing love.

33 For he does not willingly bring affliction
or grief to the children of men.

40 Let us examine our ways and test them,
and let us return to the LORD.

41 Let us lift up our hearts and our hands
to God in heaven, and say:

42 "We have sinned and rebelled
and you have not forgiven.

43 "You have covered yourself with anger and pursued us;
you have slain without pity.

44 You have covered yourself with a cloud
so that no prayer can get through.

55 I called on your name, O LORD,
from the depths of the pit.

56 You heard my plea: "Do not close your ears
to my cry for relief."

57 You came near when I called you,
and you said, "Do not fear."

just take some time to ponder this passage and ya, claim His promise that His compassion NEVER fails and His mercies are new every morning. that's what i wanna cling to.

ok. i can't rem the other thing i wanted to say. haha :P

clean

2008-02-10T21:44:00.000+08:00

hello everyone! sigh i've really been tardy about updating here. no excuses, but spiritually i've been quite sian so haven't really had any Great Insights to share.

anyway, i guess yesterday's youth worship was quite good for me. during prac i was quite annoyed at myself because i was so pitchy (being distracted and all), and so when worship started proper i just prayed that i'd be able to worship, and not just to sing. because sometimes i find myself thinking, okay i need to remember how to harmonise here etcetc till i forget that i'm not performing, i'm supposed to be worshipping God. and yesterday what we learnt at band meeting, to worship "in spirit and in truth" was running through my head too, so that was a good reminder to constantly check whether i was truly worshipping God.

i also learnt a lot from sharon's message yesterday. the thing that stuck with me is the question, "If you didn't have your voice, would you still be able to worship God?" i really identified with her situation then, because my voice is really important to me, and singing is one of my main ways of connecting with God. even now when i'm having a slight sore throat and can't really sing properly i feel sad. so i can't imagine losing my voice and being unable to "worship" God. i'm still thinking about that question, and praying that God will one day teach me how to worship Him despite everything, and even through my "least preferred" way.

When the music fades
And all is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless Your heart

next week will be really busy for me, with many deadlines and appointments to keep, so you all could just pray for strength, and for discipline to study. on a side note, as part of my involvement with Campus Crusade for Christ, i'll be going around school distributing an evangelistic newsletter so that's going to be exciting! really praying that i can reach out more in NUS, because so far i've not been doing much i think. also hoping that i can invite some of my friends to various evangelistic events that are coming up, so yeah pray for boldness too (because i usually don't ask due to my fear of rejection.)

yup i guess that's all. have a good week peoplezz :)

Desperate

2008-02-08T16:15:00.000+08:00

Believe it not I've been busy too. Teban stuff and mostly preparing for this week's worship set; took real long to do the chords and practicing quite a bit cause there's no other e guitarist. Was also a bit disheartened by my first CG outing and class though and things were picking up after the Elder Shing's message.

However, with the worship prepartions, work and other worries somehow I don't feel that constant closeness with God which really isn't cool at all. One moment I feel close to Him whilst listening to songs and worshipping in my heart but then I don't feel the desire spend time looking into His word and praying. Don't really know how to explain what I'm feeling but yah, it's rather unsettling as I wonder whether I like worshipping cause of the music and the emo words instead of truely worshipping Him etc. Doesn't help that I'm worship leading and I don't like being a hypocrite urging others to worship passionately whilst I'm like bleh.

Think I really need to discipline myself to do QT and stuff (somehow Vincent's words of getting our fundementals right with God keep coming back to me). Strangely, when I read a christian book or set time aside to pray I do feel that closeness to God but it's always the starting that is hard for me. Would rather let my mind wonder to do other things and by then I would forget bout Him. Been trying to get up early to do QT but have failed miserably cause I usally wake up at around 11a.m despite my handphone alarms.

Not cool man =(, but yah, guess I should stop sulking and better get working on it! Hence when I saw Minwei's poem I felt inspired to sing it cause I think it's what I feel too...

In Your Freedom

2008-02-08T13:49:00.000+08:00

Ok... I admit... I keep forgetting to post... Anyway...

About my spiritual walk, it is pretty low for quite a while... I guess it is my part... I'm not consistant about my QT... You know those days where you just finished knockout tuition and you lie down on your bed, exhausted. The next thing you know, the following morning has arrived. My exams are coming next week.. Pls pray for me... mainly for time management.

I put the video there because this song kinda spoke to me, esp. the chorus "I love you Lord, You rescued me"

That line really touched me and it reminded me about Jesus and His sacrifice for us...

See you all tommorow!

Yong Quan

tardiness

2008-02-07T23:40:00.000+08:00

hey guys,
firstly, i think i need to commend tianyi on being the most consistent person so far. the rest, shame on us :P sigh. but i've been so tired with school, completely bogged down with work. presentations every week till mid term then all the mid term tests then all the big essays then exam. woohoo. nothing to look forward to. this sem is really the maddest so far. i just wanna rant and complain and change modules and whatever but obviously i can't. but k. my spiritual walk, honestly, not great. actually, quite bad. i haven't had such a crappy walk since maybe j1? i don't know. hard to keep time when i'm already so advanced in years. haha. but anyway, i don't have much to share except this song/poem/prose that i wrote that pretty much sums up how i feel. i asked minjia to put a tune to it. she played a lot of stuff but i don't know if she managed it in the end. but well, if anyone comes up with something nice, let me know :P

desperate

lord i'm asking once again
i long to be in Your presence
in Your throne room, at Your feet
won't You open heaven's doors
and let me in

i'm dry from being far from You
i need Your touch again
Your power to fill me through and through
set me aflame by Your might

i'm desperate for You lord
to guide me out of this desert place
lead me to the Rock that is higher
i want to see Your face

look upon Your righteousness
touch Your nail pierced hands
see the Love who died for me
that i may understand

Publicity Video Installation II

2008-02-07T10:22:00.000+08:00

Hi all.

Here is the video as promised.

What is the other meaning for the song "Lead Me On"?

Yong Quan

P.S The MSN thing can be seen in full screen mode... Not too clear though.

P.P.S If the video above is unavaliable, then watch it from Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiRPgVbmSkw

Lead Me On

2008-01-30T20:14:00.000+08:00

Yeah... These songs are great... Planning to use one of them for the recruitment drive... Is it ok?

Yong Quan

2008-01-27T18:11:00.000+08:00

sooo as i said i would post today.
to say the least. my spiritual level now is like kinda lukewarm? like i dont think i've been spending alot of time with God/ doing QT...

and i still cant bring myself into doing homework or studying. even though thats beside the point.
but i mean.. ok as im writing this..these song's lyrics just happened to be sung at that point.

we are your people and we won't be silent.

so... what i got from that is that how can i tell people that im a christian. if my studies are so crappy. i mean its like... at the ignite conference. "im a christian. ask me why?"

people will be like... HUH TIANYI'S A CHRISTIAN???

and so yahh even thought applies to me alot i think this is one of the ways that we (or I) can improve on... in the way we live our lives sometimes..... wah quite cliche i think i heard something about living our lives propperly for God before somewhere.

everything, in a nutshell

2008-01-11T00:30:00.000+08:00

hello everyone!

i'm so sorry for my extreme tardiness this time, ack! not good, not good. anyway, part of the reason has been because i've been too busy catching up on sleep and also haven't really thought of anything much to share. but tonight i've finally decided to sit down and type this out so yeah :)

okay, i've not done my usual start-of-the-year journal entry but i have thought through what my resolutions for the year, and one of the biggest one is to spend everyday with Jesus. last year i've been pretty consistent in terms of QT but there have still been times when i was lazy and just didn't do QT, and one of the worst times was on my birthday! when i was so happy opening presents and reading cards that i slacked off and didn't read my Bible (ironically). so yeah, this year my resolution is to do QT everyday, and beyond that, spending time outside of QT thinking of God too. i find it quite a challenge, especially when school starts and my mind is mostly filled with thoughts of dieee haven't done my readings etc. haha.

another resolution that i have is to really study God's Word this year. i think i've reached a stage where i want to really equip myself with a thorough understanding of the Bible, and not just of the "easier", familiar passages in the New Testament. partly because i want to be better at defending my faith, but also because i want to know more about who God is. and this is the verse that spoke to me.

"4Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'" (Matthew 4:4)

i don't know how i'm going to get the feeding that i need though. currently, i feel that i get the solid teaching of the Word most during messages, but it depends on the speaker too. but yeah i want so much more teaching, especially of the Old Testament. i guess for the year ahead i'm just going to be like the crowds in Jesus' time, who flocked wherever there was good teaching. thankfully, so far God has been good and has brought me to several CCC events where i really received good solid teaching of the Word. hopefully that will continue.

as for my spiritual life, i guess right now it has been okay. recently something happened that made me quite burdened, but thankfully, it has forced me to turn to God more in prayer and He has proved greater than all my troubles. it's really really comforting to know that God is there for me!

on a related note, i guess you all could pray for me because i'm also at a point where i'm seeking direction for my life. i've been serving in church for quite a while (since sec3 actually), but somehow over the last couple of months i've come to realise that that is not enough for me. i want to see God's higher calling for me. some have asked why the need to, but i dunno, for me i just want to start streamlining my ministry. e.g. if God calls me to be a pastor, right now i'll start looking for opportunities that will equip me with the skills needed for pastoring. i just want to stop serving haphazardly, and to start training myself properly.

however, this period is very challenging because i am being asked to serve in such-and-such areas and it's difficult to just say no let me wait on God first. it's taking a lot of faith to believe that God will speak in time for me not to annoy anyone with my tardy reply, and also to believe that God will eventually speak. another challenge i face is discerning between God's best and God's good. what if i don't like God's best for me? (i.e. it's not my first choice of service) what if i miss out on His best because i make a decision too hastily?

so yeah a lot of things for me to think about. haha. yup that's roughly all la, see you guys on saturday! :)

The Foothold

2008-01-08T17:05:00.000+08:00

"And do not give the devil a foothold" Ephesians 4:27

A new year... Another 51 weeks to go before the new year comes again... Anyway, I really want to thank God for my new class for the next two years! It is really awesome! I mean, seriously, God really answers our prayers pretty fast. During the prayer meeting on the 29th of Dec, '07, Ben, Reuben, Matthieu and myself are in one big prayer group, and when Ben was asking us to ask God what he wants from us in the new year (I think) this part of a song keeps playing on my mind, like some broken record.

The Bright and Morning Star
The Great I Am You are,
Jesus
Jesus

The King Above All Kings,
Creator of all things,
Jesus
Jesus

The song is titled "Jesus" from the Never Stop album. (I think it is in the Saviour of the World album too).

For today's sharing, I would like to share about the book I am reading again "Every Man, God's Man" (was mentioned in my earlier post). Now i want to share about Chapter 8, cos God spoke to me again. The chapter is entitled "Do not give the devil a foothold"

Anyway the chapter starts by talking about D-Day during WWII, it depicts the Allies (USA) trying to take the beach of Normandy which the Germans were trying their very best to hold it out. So it is like, when books describe scenes like that, naturally your mind would wander and try to picture the scene right? Anyway i see machine guns blazing and a lot of men falling. Yeah anyway... the book goes on to describe a period after D-Day started, that the US troops have finally secured one tiny ground on the Normandy beach. (Secured as in "with no bullets shot at them and a safe area to rest) From that tiny ground, the Allies took over the beach in a matter of hours.

My point is not to go fight a war for the fun of it, but my point is that this can be applied into our spiritual lives. For example... argh I'll just give an analogy. P.S if it is related to anyone living or dead, it is totally coincidental ok?

John, a Sec 4 kid, has a great passion for God. He is actively serving as a CGL intern. He has great academic results, popular in school and in church. But, he has a terrible weakness for smoking. As in, he was a passive smoker and he allows his classmates to let him breathe some smoke in once a week. His thoughts are such that :" Aiyah, once a week only mah! I can stop whenever I like" So he just keeps this skeleton in his closet alive.

Soon, one of his xiong dih (hierachy in class) offers him a cigarette stick. John ponders:" God will allow one stick lar... I suppose" John took the stick.

Sooner or later, John was not only smoking, he was sniffing glue as well. By now he felt very distant from God. He keeps thinking:" Oh no! Somewhere in the Bible, God says that our bodies are a temple of God. I corrupted it with drugs!!! Now how? Now how???" John felt very withdrawn from God. He denied the fact that Jesus died for him, since he felt that he was too bad for God to rescue. Soon he left church and a few days later, a newspaper report rose and it read that John had commited suicide.

So what can we learn from this analogy? Personally I feel that this is one case that the devil finds a foothold and starts fighting for the rest of you. In the book I was reading, the author said that the devil will look for your weakness and manipulate it. Once he gets a steady ground, the devil will fight long and hard to get the rest of you down to hell with him. But God will save us. He never failed us once at all. I mean, just ask yourselves, When did God ever fail you? (crap I'm sounding like a preacher... sorry)

During Sat's Youth service, after the message, Euclid prayed for me and he told me this "No matter what you do, it cannot pull you away from God's love" (forgive me if i quoted wrongly, Euclid!) It is SUUUUPER encouraging lar, such an awesome God can love a sinner such as ourselves, He loves us SOOOO much that He could send His own son down to die for our sins!!!

"Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you" James 4:7

God will provide us the resources and the weapons needed to whack the devil back to Berlin (sorry I just studied History today abt WWI and I REALLY hate Germany)... But I suppose we gotta stay strong, bonded by the Spirit of God. I read this from somewhere (again, I cannot remember where)

Stand together, pray for each other and continue to seek God, and the devil will find no place to bombard with his flaming arrows of lies

Yup... that's about all I gotta say... See you all this coming Saturday!!!!!!!!

What is this love, given to us,t saved my life, the selfless sacrifice

2008-01-06T22:25:00.000+08:00

hey everyone.

ah i guess i'll just cut to the chase.

i haven't had a good week at all seriously. i've had stuff ranging from school...to cca to friendships
and.. well i was really discouraged lah i guess.. mostly for the 'friendship' section.

cuz i mean... i suppose the older youths like josh,minwei,joel etc etc have like...been really waiting for this revival in the youth lah.. and then. suddenly unexpected problems begin to show up and stuff...

And just because of that. friendships get threatened. people get hurt. and trust is pretty much lost in the process as well..

well. i really didn't know what to do back then lah i guess...
i guess i was feeling really angry at the people who started the problem and i really just wanted to slap them or something....

but yeah... God revealed to me through a friend that like...would that really be what God wanted me to do?
and even though it was really really hard.... i guess... me ,******,****,**,****** all pulled through lah i guess.... which im really really thankful for! :D

and i was super dooper touched by the worship last sat by the way. cuz yeah the lyrics Hosanna in the Highest really spoke to me. like... whenever we have problems. God's always there in his throne just waiting for us to call out to him (:

and um.... yeah lah please pray for my studies toooo.... that i'll really really study this 2 years cuz i dont wanna go for Con Camp cuz its during the june and dec hols and i really really wanna go youth/church camp!

and my willpower is seriously just failing me. for now i guess.

renewal

2008-01-06T12:09:00.000+08:00

hey guys...

i'm not sure if i shared in my previous posting but God has been really good to me these few days? haha. basically, during the last part of 07, i was feeling incredibly dry and even during the transformers camp, i wasn't very 'touched' or anything, there was no spiritual high for me although of course, i was very encouraged by the work God was doing and the way in which He answered my prayers for the camp.

but anyway, i'm the journalling sort. i've been journally quite faithfully since maybe like when i was 19. yes, looong time ago but ya, during my dry period, i felt like it was so pointless to journal coz i had nothing much to say. u know how we usually start off with thanksgiving and all? i felt like i had nothing to say and journalling had just become a chore although it's a good way to properly pray coz i write down my prayers and it helps to have something to look back to when answered prayers come along and i need confirmation and stuff. but anyway, i decided to just stop journalling out of habit and to take things a little easier. again, since maybe about 19, i've made a point to do my qt first thing in the morning to set my focus right for the day and stuff but maybe at the start of the new year, i was lamenting to God about the state of my spiritual life and i decided to do thing differently. i will only journal when i want to and i won't do my qt out of habit. hmmm. i sound like a terrible person now but the truth is, God responded and has somehow put this new zeal and desire in my heart to spend time with Him. now, i journal at night or in the afternoons, whenever i feel like i want to and when i read the bible, it's no longer dry and boring but i'm learning new things everyday. and i can honestly say that i'm excited about what the Spirit has to reveal to me in His word daily now. i wake up in the morning and i'm happy coz i can sense His presence in my life tangibly :)

i'll share some things that He has taught me la. some of it might seem quite duh but it was so refreshing when He opened my eyes. i'm reading the book of Romans now and somehow, this phrase popped up at me, 'Spirit of holiness' (1:4) and i was so wow and then as i was pondering it, i was like, of course la, He's the HOLY Spirit what. and then i went on to consider what that means and i realised that the Holy Spirit is holiness itelf. His character is personified in His name and it dawned upon me that i cannot ask for the Spirit to fill me if i am not holy coz unholiness is antithetical to Him. i'm not saying that we can be holy on our own efforts but that we must have a spirit of humility to ask Him to reveal our sins to us, to confess and repent and to have the blood of Jesus wash us white as snow. and we can be holy by seeking to have an attitude of obedience to His word. it is ridiculous to speak of holiness without mention of an obedient and surrendered life. so yeah, the concluding point from this pop-up would be that we cannot ask to be filled with the Holy Spirit if we are clinging on to unholiness.

yes, the second thing is a very familiar passage from Romans 12:1-2
'Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.'
this was quoted to me by doreen yesterday. i can't remember the context of the situation but this morning when i woke up, i was pondering it. it's a familiar passage that i had to memorise in the past and it's a blessing to commit His word to memory la. something i hope to do more often this year :P but anyway, as i recited the passage to myself in my mind, i was struck by the word 'transformed' coz obviously, that reminds us of the recent camp and the answer to being transformed is encapsulated in the verse. to not conform any longer to the ways of the world and to have our minds renewed. the first would be pretty obvious. to be aliens and strangers in the world, to be set apart for God etc. the second part, the renewing of our minds, how does that happen? i believe that it's through the study of His word, allowing it to judge our hearts and thoughts, allowing if to be a purifying and focussing agent in our lives. the reason why i say focussing is coz i believe the bible helps us to declutter. not just like our physical lives but also our emotional lives. forgiving enemies, pressing on ahead, having our security in our identity in Christ. the word of God does so much more than the little i've mentioned.

wow. i'm learning things as i'm writing them out. God is way cool :)

anyway, my resolution for this year would be to read the bible more and to know His word better coz that's important :)

Direction

2008-01-03T16:35:00.000+08:00

Wow, sorry I wasn't able to find the time to post on the blog coz the month of December was seriously hectic. Ever since camp I was busy with the Teban Christmas Party Games Stalls, following that was the Thanksgiving Video and in between were a number of family gatherings and people calling me up for advice, Christmas Cards, Christmas Shopping, meeting up with friends, trying to exercise (just started 2 days ago after a 1 month absence, my body is aching =D)... Phew, finally I've some time by myself infront of the computer without something to be worried about.

Things have been going fine for me spiritually and stuff though I was slightly discouraged for a while during the worship session which Minwei was talking about. Was a bit disheartened that the Youths did not carry over all of that passion and enthusiasm when it comes to worship for God from camp back to our regular Youth Service.

But it was kinda short lived as I decided to worship God and put into action what I always encourage others to do; disregarding those around us and focus on Him. So yah, if it encourages you a little I was ministered to during that worship and basically it's been wonderful everything we gather to enter into God's presence. Albeit there are still some nagging worries at the back of my brain such as the Youth and myself not recapturing the fire back at camp, that the ministry would "stagnate" and not seek God more but just wait for camps to do that, people feeling left out, etc. I guess throughout the year God has time and time again taught me to just trust in Him and believe that He is going to do something great in our midst and ultimately it's His work. Everytime I had these fears, He has never failed to amaze me so I hope this year I will spend less time worrying (I struggle alot of this) and believing in our God as a God of power and that the seed He has sown He will see to completion. As for my part, it's to remain faithful.

Ooo, just recollected that I've got quite a cool personal sharing. Hmm, not sure if I should share it here. Perhaps another time when we meet up =). Oh yah, recruitment drive how sia?

Anyway, as I now find myself with quite a bit of free time I hope you guys can pray for me as to what should I do. Haven't really had the time to seriously consider which area I should move into. Should I get a job like most of my friends? If yes should it be full time or part-time? Should I attend somes courses at SBC instead? Or should I try taking up an internship at church? I'm really quite uncertain as to what exactly should I do but I'm more inclined to do something related to knowing / serving God. So what if my resume lacks one less job experience or if I run dry on my savings (I ain't getting any pocket money and my bank account consist purely of what I earnt during NS =p). Don't think I'll ever be given the luxury of 6 months free time. Hmm... but I still dunno sia and I don't want to do church related stuff, appealing as it may be, if it ain't where God wants me to be. What should I do now God?

hmm..

2008-01-01T18:26:00.000+08:00

ok. obviously no one heeds what i said and tianyi the tooty used the thanksgiving service bit as an excuse. by the way, josh, i think u haven't posted for like a month. as u know, a new year usually comes with a resolution or many resolutions so this year's resolution will be that we all blog every 2 weeks as agreed upon several months ago :P

anyway, i realise once again that i didn't do what i told others to. i can come up with the usual excuses, been busy, was sick, am sick, don't like using the internet, whatever. but the excuses don't matter la. so i shall just share...

last night during the thanksgiving service, edward led 'at the cross' and what really touched my heart was the third stanza:

And when the earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me
I know You love me
I know You love me

don't know why... maybe all the phelgm was going to my head but i was somehow able to imagine what it might be like if Jesus was before me. i've never been much good at this. when i was in sec sch, we went through this thing where we were guided as to how to reflect before taking the holy communion. the first part would be a revisiting the cross, imagining Him on it and the pain and stuff but i could never really do that. my imagination power's not that great. haha. but anyway, back to my story, i imagined myself before Jesus and i saw myself reaching out to Him and that's when i realised, He's my treasure. then the familiar teachings of Jesus came to mind too. about how where my treasure is, there my heart will be also and i told Him, yes Lord, i want my heart to be with You. i'm not sure if u all can empathise but sometimes i'm so unsure of where my heart is. but well, the bible does say that the heart is deceitful above all things but my point is that i was encouraged by what i just shared coz i've been feeling quite dry recently. but joanne reminded me on sat whilst praying for me that i will seek Him and find Him when i seek Him with all my heart so yeah, i guess that's something that the rest of u can pray for me regarding...

i was also quite discouraged by the week before's youth service when everyone seemed so dead and i was mulling over it the whole time after service, accounting for why i looked so moody during the block party and stuff (ps: i do have reasons for being black face. haha) but ya, at night when i was praying about it, i was reminded of something that jeremy shared during the music min meeting in i don't know which month. the whole thing about how the band is not restricted to the musicians and wls but also the congregation because the only audience is God and our desire is to have Him shout 'encore' and yeah, that's when i realised that whether a worship session is good or not is not dependent on the wl. so many times, i've felt like it was but it isn't. whether or not we experience His presence incredibly depends on His favour and whether we're earnestly seeking Him as one. the bottom line of it all is that regardless of how the congregation is responding, my own response has to be to worship Him myself first regardless. so yeah...

anyway, can pray for me la. i hate being sick... :(

Every man, God's man

2007-12-22T23:36:00.001+08:00

Yeah... it is been a long time since I last posted... Anyway I want to share about a book that I was reading... It is titled:"Every Man, God's Man" by Stephen Arterburn and Kenny Luck... So yeah... thought it was a pretty cool book and bought it, started reading it thinking that it is just a book... How wrong I was.

The second chapter of this book was titled:"Our Divided Hearts" and the quoted verse struck me.

The eyes of the LORD search the whole earth in order to strenghten those whose hearts are fully commited to Him. [2 Chronicles 16:9]

I mean, when you read the verse, typical ppl would say that their hearts are fully commited, thus the above verse is related to them. But it got me thinking... I mean, thoughts just got into my mind, such as "Why am I serving the Music Ministry?", "Do I really have a heart for God?"... all these kind of questions that can seriously blow up your morale.

As I read further on in the chapter, it is talking about how people literally chiong forward, telling God, "I want to serve you!", but when they see the amount of time they have to spend serving etc. (a.k.a commitment), they start to break off from the service. So... what is a definition of "A Divided Heart"? Personally, I think that a divided heart is like the story about the rich young ruler in Mark 10:17-25. A divided heart is when part of you want to serve God, while the other part wants to serve the world. Example... my school life. A couple of months back, before God appeared to me, I always wanted to please my classmates so that I can scale up the Popularity Ladder. Pleasing my classmates is defined here as:Bullying the anti-social guy in the class, talking bad about ppl, agree with the Top Dogs whatever they say, even if it goes against your personal principles... That is the heart which wants to serve the world. I remember reading this from somewhere... not too sure where...

"If you serve the world, the world welcomes you. But if you want to run after Jesus, the world will despise you. Friends will turn away from you, calling you a weirdo and a supporter of nothingness"
I mean... in my case, this statement is pretty true. When I started witnessing (and during the exam period... a little weird right?) my "buddies" refuse to talk to me and they call me "Jesus freak", "Fanatic", even "Demon possesed". To God be the praise... He was protecting me all the way.

So, do we have divided hearts? I think soul searching and praying to God will help us answer the question... If we live according to the standards of the world, who are we living for? But if we live for Jesus, we will gain MUCH MUCH more compared to what the world can give...

Yeah... I'm also crapping too much... Signing off...

God rocks!

2007-12-22T22:46:00.000+08:00

hey alllll
ok yeah im posting cuz i think God kinda revealed something to me through my maid and stuffs.

so yeah. cuz i bought a pair of new shoes, and it like 'bit' the skin of my heels. so it really hurts unless i wear high socks ( which is never gonna happen )

so my maid was like. you must bite the new shoe (as in really bite it anywhere), so the shoe wont bite you. then i was like huh???? isnt that some old wives tale.

then when i was walking to church, i was still thinking about it. then it came to me like. the reason why people dont believe in God.

ok even though it might be really obvious sometimes e.g
(they want control of their own lives etc etc)

But yea i think i managed to see what the other non-christians see.
the point is. that they just don't believe it. and because God's miracles are like so incredible, it really can be super hard to just believe.

like..i didn't believe my maid at all about the biting shoe thing cuz...well firstly i thought, shoes can't respond. 2ndly, it just seemed so impossible, even though she said that she bites her shoes each time she buys a new pair.

wow im beating around the bush alot i think. i cant think straight now.

so its like... firstly, non-christians dont know that God responds, so they may be doubtful, as i was.

2ndly, God's miracles are so impossible and incredible, its so hard to believe sometimes as a non-christian even though you testify to them sometimes, and may seem a little crazy too.

oh well i dont know how meaningful it is to you guys but yeah.
i felt the need to post it :/

and there i find release

2007-12-20T22:35:00.000+08:00

hello everyone!

i've put off this post because i've been way too lazy to type everything out, but well, thought i should stop procrastinating and get this done (so i can start on my Christmas cards tomorrow haha).

where do i start sharing? guess it would be good for me to talk about how youth camp was for me.

honestly, i didn't want to go for youth camp. yup, horribly and honestly. because i felt out-of-place, since i'm not a cgl and not really part of raft and camp comm etc. and exams also made it difficult for me to really help out in camp prep till the last week. so i was quite reluctant to go for camp because i didn't want to feel old and leftout, and just thinking about being a "floater" was scary. but my friend encouraged me with the thought that God has a REASON for bringing me to camp, and i must just be open enough to see what it is. so off i went for camp, feeling rather nervous and scared.

now let me gather my thoughts into several neatly-labelled points.

1) i thank God for teaching me humility. i guess all the recent excellent worship sessions i've led have caused me to become rather proud, and i think not doing much for this camp was a good way of teaching me that i'm not indispensable. and it also afforded me more time to interact with people, pray and see things from the outside perspective.

i've always had an aversion to altar calls because i've always told myself that every altar call i answer must mark a CHANGE in my life, and i've been too proud to admit that i need to change things. e.g. i've always been saying, i know i'm proud but i'm not THAT proud. but on worship night, God touched me. firstly, i knelt for the first time in worship, and even though at that point it didn't feel terribly special, just the physical posture of humility helped me to enter a more humble state of mind. then when pastor daniel gave the altar call, i just knew that i'd to answer it. previously, i've always tried to work up feelings to justify answering altar calls because when you see everyone going to the front, standing alone at the back can be very terrifying. but i'm glad i held back then, because on worship night i felt the difference. i felt this fierce thudding in my heart and it was GOD who led me to the front.

so that night was the third altar call i've ever answered in my life, and as i stood there, i was praying for God to show me things i should change in my life, because i needed to make this altar call count. and God is truly amazing. somehow, He managed to dig out all sorts of junk in my heart and made me see that there are so many things in my life that are displeasing Him. let me share one example.

that night, i learnt that i'd to have a 180 degrees change in mindset. all along, i've been thinking, "God, I want to serve You in this area." but that night i realised that that's actually a proud mindset! i'm dictating to Him what I want to do. instead, i should be praying, "God, what do YOU want me to serve You in?" that was seriously a mindblowing change that i'd to make, and it's not an easy one for me to do. i'm still struggling with it, but i thank God for bringing this to light.

2) i thank God for teaching me more about gifts of the Holy Spirit. previously, i've always been quite closed-off to teachings about things like speaking in tongues, falling under the power of God, prophecies etc. but i think this camp has made me more open to such things. i must admit that when i was on stage during powerpoint when pastor daniel was praying for the CGLs and people started falling all around me i was TERRIFIED, but still. i guess this camp, which incidentally also tied in well with the book i was reading at that point, made me see that the Holy Spirit is also about power, and now i'm more open to learning about how this can be demonstrated in a Christian's life.

3) i thank God for teaching me about prayer. prayer has never been my strong point, and throughout this year i've resented God sometimes for seemingly failing to answer my prayers. but what God taught me this camp was: a) to go to Him FIRST in prayer, and b) to trust Him.

on the 2nd night, i was feeling very needy and at that point i really prayed that God would bring someone to pray for me that night. but as i was struggling with all these during worship, He reminded me that even if He doesn't bring people to pray for me that night, i didn't have to worry because i still have the Holy Spirit praying for me, and the Spirit prays according to the will of God! (Romans 8) so after that i felt more relieved, and even though yes that night no one prayed for me, i was still able to feel the peace of God.

and i think camp taught me a very crucial lesson about prayer, that we go first to God and then to man. i've always done the reverse - going to everyone else BUT God with my problems, and then complaining that no one can help. but well, i think going to God first is the better solution. because He knows my need, and He knows who to bring and at what time. isn't that an easier way? and all i need to do is to trust in His timing :)

so yes those are the main lessons i wanna share with everyone.

You are the peace that guards my heart
My help in times of need
You are the hope that leads me on
And brings me to my knees

For there I find You waiting
And there I find release
So with all of my heart I'll worship
And unto You I'll sing

*For You alone deserve all glory
For You alone deserve all praise
Father we worship and adore You
Father we long to seek Your face
For You alone deserve all glory
For You alone deserve all praise
Father we love You
And we worship You this day

2007-12-20T07:16:00.000+08:00

hiyo amigos.
i suppose you can read this on my blog but. oh well.

I LOVED THE CAMPPP
it was super awesome! even though i dont really know what happened during worship night but im sure it was cool.
but yeah im sharing about "jessica's" worship that day.

Gosh seriously i was super touched that day while playing bass and. yeah i really thought that jess's set for that day was super appropriate for them i guess...
i mean all the people in the front. with the slow song set, as jess said. kind of reminded all of us that worship isnt all about the music and pumping beats. and it should never be that way i guess. so yeah kinda out of point i guess...

so anyway. i was really really touched cuz its like.. this has been what we've been waiting for right? a revival . so it was like.... er..
like when your daddy gives you a present that you've always wanted. except in this case 100000000000000000x better. (:

then i guess its in this kind of environment where the 'musicians' get their 'boost' well i dunno i did get one. i felt so.. determined to just play super well and stuff. like really lead them into worship and the presence of God. it was just so awesome.
( i even recalled that worship in africa ok!) so yeah. whooooo youth! FTW!

i'm sorry :O

2007-12-16T22:07:00.000+08:00

haha. yes yes. i am aware i have broken my own fortnight rule because well, i was busy with my exams and then after that was camp whereby i had to go to church for prac almost everyday and then came camp itself and ahh, we're rushing towards christmas now. dec is like a mad mad rush. maybe this is how new yorkers feel like or something. haha.

hmm. i guess the most normal thing would be to share how youth camp was for me. well, the most encouraging and heartening thing for me was to see everyone worshiping God with arms lifted high and receiving from God, praying for people. amazing sight. something i've been praying for and will keep praying for. we must persevere in praying for our ministry because this is only just the beginning and i'm eager to see God move in even more incredible ways. what really touched my heart was to see my sister (guess which one) singing to God with raised hands and then kneeling down and just seeking God. when i saw that, i cried coz it's another answered prayer and it feels so much more amazing when it's someone close to u. yeah.

but yeah, i don't think i was a very 'good' person during the camp. i was actually supposed to stay over but i felt quite miserable coz i felt so old! and like i have no friends. haha. sound so pathetic right. and ya, i chose the easiest way out. i went home. but on thurs at dinner, my father said that i should have stayed coz i'm a leader and by leaving, i was like deserting everyone. and at first i was quite irritated but when i thought about it, God showed me how true that reprimand was and ya, i should have tried to get to know people better, make the new and young people feel at ease and stuff but yeah, i guess it's coz i was so tired from the mad rush from exams to prac to camp and i was kinda dry la. u know how bad things happen more often when we're dry. so ya la. if u see me doing stupid things like this again, tell me k. haha. come on. sharpening each other right? haha.

but ya. i wanna say woohooooooooo to tianyi coz i'm really impressed by your commitment to excellence. i was realy quite skeptical about u playing bass but wow. u are better than some other bassists who have played longer so yay. cool man. when i need a bassist, i can look to u! haha. so yeah, keep up this pursuit of excellence la. God deserves our best and more. and not just in terms of service but everything. your studies too! haha.

anyway, another amazing thing. not that i really prayed about it but i think i whined about it. basically, somehow, the english department at nus are having 2 other 4000 level mods. which means that i don't have to do this dreaded boring module called modern critical theory!!! haha. which means i should be a happier person next sem la. theory kinda sucks. haha. so yay!!!!!!! :)

NEW POST :D

2007-12-13T23:25:00.001+08:00

haha i've not kept to my fortnightly update SO SORRY. but i've just posted on raft so can check that out! will post about camp soon, once i've finished consolidating all my thoughts.

but yeah, God is awesome :)

After Camp

2007-12-13T20:21:00.000+08:00

God is so AWESOME! Think my previous post can be disregarded =p.

Just Before Youth Camp

2007-12-10T03:01:00.000+08:00

Haha, like Tianyi I don't want to infringe on our once every 2 weeks agreement. Well, Youth Camp officially starts in about 6 hours time. I personally feel the build up to the camp has been awesome, especially so the past 2 weeks both in church and outside. It's also so exciting hearing people anticipate the camp so eagerly and all this talk by people about revival happening right in the midst of our very own Youth Ministry.

However, right now I'm just feeling this sense of anxiety and worry. After trying to call up my group members and fix up quiet time groupings I just kept having these nagging doubts at the back of my head; that this camp may not live up to all the hype that's been surrounding it. Or what if I am not able to click well with my group (it's been a while since I've been a TL and it's such a young group). Or what if campers feel left out to state a few.

I really so so so so so desire that God would really impact the lives of ALL the youths who come down and that it would just infect all those around them with a blazing passion for God - but what if a large number of Youths still feel equally distant from God after the camp? I know that a lot of these fears are due to my inability to place enough trust in God's sovereign will and because I have these preconceived notions of how I wish things would turn out but that may not be what God intends to do during this camp. Sigh... feeling so emo now but O God would You please allow a mighty outpouring of Your Spirit to fill the lives of the Youths during this camp!!! Let non-christians become believers during this camp!!! Cause this ministry to truly be on fire for You and one that multiplies!!! We've waited so long and we want more!!!

Sigh... though I think I know what is the correct mindset I should have now with regard to the camp, it's just been hard to open these tightly clenched fist and truly let go and believe that God will handle everything perfectly no matter how things may appear. Was feeling kinda perplexed but as I write these things it has sort of been a therapeutic experience as I articulate my flaws and focus on the fact that our God truly reigns. That being said, though I'm still kinda tired emotionally I'm quite happy how my negative attitude is changing quite drastically as this little "soliloquy" ensues. Wish I could pray with someone now to sooth my nerves a little more but it's not really the right time to call anyone now.

As I was typing, the bridge of "Second Chance" really ministered to me: "So I wait upon You now with my hands released to You. Where a little faith's enough to see mountains lift and move". There's so much more God's got to do with my life and teach me... I find that awesome =).

Hope I'll look back at the things I've wrote and laugh at my foolishness. Exceed our wildest imaginations during this camp Jesus.

2007-12-09T12:55:00.000+08:00

ok this week's been pretty hectic for me i guess... cuz there's been alot of worship pracs one after another. but i kinda enjoy it lah hahah gosh so weird.
anyway. yeah. what i wanna share now is about..prayer
i've been reading this book and inside theres this part which says "I know now Lord,why you utter no answer.You, yourself is the answer"

which kinda makes me think of this song which i have forgotten the title.. but it goes like... "you're all i want..you're all i ever needed" etc etc.
and yah i think i wanted to share this because im going away for quite long and if i dont post now...means that i would break the fortnight rule like min wei.

just joking.

Response To Tianyi's Blog Post

2007-12-02T00:15:00.000+08:00

Hey dude, tried posting this under the comments portion of your blog put apparently there isn't enough space and I dont have a Vox account which I am lazy to sign up for =p.

Anyway, my 2 cents worth is that that "paralysed" feeling you felt can quite likely be attributed to fatigue. Think it occurs when your body is tired but your mind is still active. I've experienced it once too and was a bit freaked out initially- but after praying and waiting it got better. (I'm not saying that what you went through was definitely of a physical nature only but this is a possibility)

I bet your experience was more freaky with the creepy laughing you heard. (Somehow I'm not comfortable with the term "demonic encounter" so I'll stick to spiritual attack) However, though it could be very possible that what you experienced had a spiritual element in the form of a spiritual attack, my personal opinion is that we should try not to give the devil any "credit" possible.

Using your experience as an example, how do we give the noobster devil "credit"? I think it's when we adopt the attitude that it was "DEFINTELY the devil doing his thing, we were POWERLESS to move" or when we allow that experience to cause fear or doubts about our relationship with God to creep into our lives.

2 Tim 1:7 - "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."

Though the spiritual realm is very real and yes satan does try to mess around, I personally feel that we should firstly be cautious to point our finger towards that thing with the horns. There are times when I've felt that I've been on the end of what seemed like a spiritual attack. But having reflected about some of these times, I've come to realize that some of these negative feelings actually arose from issues in my life that I had not resolved with God more than the devil trying to use his fork to prod me. (Ok, don't this point really relates to your experience specifically because your's happened rather involuntarily and quickly)

Secondly, even if it was a spiritual attack we should not allow that feeling of fear, doubt, etc. to linger in our lives. I'm glad that your first response to what you felt was to call upon God and praise Him that He responded in a tangible way to you. But let's try to take it another step further and reject any remnant fears in the name of Jesus because He has given us a spirit of power. Unpleasant as that experience may have been, let's not be afraid that the devil may try it again. If he wants to try again, bring it on! Cause this time we're more prepared and I'm sure the Holy spirit in me is going to kick the devil posterior! To sum it up in a term I've learnt in NS, be "garang".

Thirdly, do not conclude that because we've faced a spirtual attack, there is definitely something wrong in our lives. Though it's true that we can never be 100% Christ-like in this life, let's not go about bashing ourselves up thinking,"Perhaps I'm not seeking God correctly. If He was truly inside of me, I would not have experienced this spirtual attack. Is He really in my life in the first place?". To set the record straight yes, the Holy Spirit is inside of you and always will be when you received Him. He ain't the sort who walks out on people, we are the one's who choose to quench Him. Back to my former point, the devil does attack people who are doing fine spirtually (this does not mean we are satisfied with our current walk with God, we must always desire more!). I think of Job, pretty decent chap, you know the rest.

Fourthly, I don't think most of us are guilty of this but let's not go to the other extreme whereby we think that we must be doing something correct with God hence the devil wants to attack our lives. I think it is possible that people can contort matters in a perverse matter and think that,"Gosh, I'm going through so much opposition with this bunch of people, this must be a spiritual attack, which means I'm doing God's will because the devil attacks those who are spiritual strong. Therefore I must be doing the right thing and should persist." Such logic rides on a very slippery slope as a twisted sense of pride / self-righteousness overcomes the person being "attacked".

To summarize, always discern what's happening in our lives and examine our own lives first before blaming the devil. And even if it were a spiritual attack, let's rise above what the devil can feebly throw with God's anointing in our lives and grow spiritually instead of digressing into fear or discouragement.

Oh gosh, I hope I have not rambled on incessantly but I'm not exactly sure of your experience thus I've tried to cover the bases in my very limited capacity. Hope it has given you some insight and likewise for any other reader (coming up with this has taught me quite a bit). And yep, not directly related to your blogpost, my sensing is that you've been chionging a bit too much for your own good with kool camp, practices and the anxiety of band camp back then lah. Don't burn yourself out yah. Remember to always seek Him in the secret place everyday and prepare yourself / ourselves for the Youth Camp and whatever else our awesome God has prepared for us =).

(No title avaliable)

2007-11-29T22:17:00.000+08:00

Hi all.

I just seen Tianyi's post in his own blog, about a spiritual attack... It sounds very freaky... Tianyi was suggesting that Pastor can preach about that... Anyway...

I was reading Galatians 5:22-23, about the fruits of the Spirit... In a nutshell,
-Love
-Joy
-Peace
-Patience
-Kindness
-Goodness
-Faithfulness
-Gentleness
-Self Control

In my cca meetings, we were planning a musical based on the theme "Censorship". Everyone were bringing their points forward such that they were accusing some people for receiving more attention compared to the others. Hatred and jealousy can be tasted in the air. I mean, from what Pastor mentioned two weeks ago during the YM session, he said something like when we are baptized by the Holy Spirit, the fruit of the Spirit should show (Correct me if I'm wrong).

I mean, seriously, my school is such that results matter only. Even the students form their own clicks. They form in that sense where popularity and results are the main thing... If not... BANG! You get shot from all directions without any avaliable cover. I'm gonna be very honest here. Before the month of September this year, I was like one of them. I enjoyed "killing" any people that threaten my position as "Powerful mastermind" in class. Most of my classmates fear me(not that I'm proud of it now...) because I used to radiate an aura of danger. Now, with the cca meetings make me think back about that time... God touched me during a YM session in the month of September, during one of the altar calls. He reminded me of the fruit of the Spirit and Christ's love for me. From then, I was changed. I enjoyed serving in the Music Ministry and I'm so glad that God would love a sinner like me... My "friends" noticed that I changed since I started spreading God's message around. I am very glad to say that one of my classmates, who used to scorn Christianity, is coming for the Transformers Camp!!

All I can say here is... I'm really glad God changed me... To God be the praise!

Signing off,
Yong Quan

P.S Can you all pray for my classmate who's coming for the camp? Pray that God can change his heart like He changed mine...

2007-11-29T11:08:00.000+08:00

hey all.
on my latest post.
please do check my blog for it. its labelled.
I'll stand, with arms high and heart abandoned

& i'm leaving on a jet plane

2007-11-23T08:32:00.000+08:00

ok! just before i leave for the...kiddie's camp thingy :/
i think i should post. so i'll be 'free'
and yes! i am super excited about youth's worship this week!
cuz. its exciting!

and this week hasn't been much spiritual stuff happening for me though.
cuz i've been basically surviving through the usual week of tuition.

But um yeah i've been doing my QT too :P
been reading some boook called street-wise spirituality
and there's this part about spirituality being a "connection" with God.
yea and i think like this week i haven't really 'connected' with God.

ok. but there was this time when i watched the united we stand bonus dvd
and it was SUPER COOOL! and i got goosebumps just thinking about how great God could make the hillsong youth grow, from 20 people to 10000000000 people.
yeah they said that in the documentary later on.

um yeah so thats my weeek..
oh we so have to get a smoke machine. like in the introduction of united we stand.
SO COOOL!

Fall In This Place

2007-11-21T22:33:00.000+08:00

Hey all.

God touched me when I listened to this song... and I felt that I need to share this with all of you.

Fall In This Place

Verse 1

Take me to that place Lord

Where there's nothing else but me and You

Longing for Your presence

I know that You're calling me to You

Prechorus

Here I stand

And long for Your embrace

Nothing else

Could ever take Your place

Chorus

Come Holy Spirit

Fall in this place

I need more and more of You

Fill me again with the power of Your Spirit

Lord I'm crying out for more and more of You

I mean, for me personally, the Youth Ministry and God's revival fire comes to my mind when I listened to this song. So let us keep praying for the Youth Ministry!!

Oh yeah... P.S this song is from Pick It Up album by Planetshakers... If you really want details its the 4th song on the first disc

our God is an AWESOME GOD

2007-11-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

hello!

i think i owe an entry haha. but i've been so lazy to actually type out what i've been learning, as i tried to tell tianyi last saturday.

anyway, what has happened the last 2 weeks? i think spiritually it has been down and up. 2 weekends ago i was feeling very discouraged because the youth carolling/Christmas event thing didn't materialise, and i was just feeling very lousy. thinking that hey i really wanna do something for God so why couldn't He have made things happen? but i think that experience taught me that a) i need to stop thinking i'm really capable because there're so many things that are out of my control. and b) that ministry requires PRAYER (more on that later).

another thing that compounded my misery that weekend was hearing all the talk about the parents being upset and all. i saw it coming a few weeks' ago because my mum talks to me about such things, and during that particular week i remember juls and i discussing the whole issue at much length. but i was still very troubled by it all, least of all because i don't really know how to react to it. what should my stand be? so yes i was feeling very troubled and discouraged.

but thankfully, God sent a close friend who listened me out and provided much food for thought, and i thank God :)

then last week was a lot of seeking God for guidance as to the song set. every time i lead worship i REALLY struggle with the issue of pride, so last week was no different. but thank God for His mercy in making everything good, even though prac was quite bad haha.

i think i've learnt a few lessons from all these experiences.

1) the importance of PRAYER. prayer has never been my strong point because i tend to get bored very easily, but these couple of weeks (especially saturday's prayer meeting before worship) taught me the importance of prayer. now i fully understand and believe in the saying, "No Prayer, No Power". and usually when i pray at home it's really half-hearted and quite short, but i think God's teaching me how to enjoy praying more. having a greater desire to spend time talking to Him, praying for others (i've realised that this helps me to want to pray more, somehow) and yeah just reading His Word too. QT has become more of a joy :)

2) that life isn't a bed of roses. sometimes i think that God should give me an easy week because if i'm on a spiritual high, i should be able to transcend everything right? but i think i've learnt, through all my busyness these few weeks, that it's not true. i can be physically and emotionally exhausted, but still spiritually strong. the nature of life IS that it is challenging and tiring at times, and God doesn't expect us to be perpetually joyful and on a spiritual high. what He DOES expect, though, is a willingness to always stick close to Him.

3) that KNOWING God's Word is extremely important. i was ticked off by my friend for not knowing my Bible properly, and that taught me how crucial it is that we check every single practice/teaching against the Bible. i dunno, this experience has made me realise how important it is to be spiritually discerning, and i really want to have that. also seeking to study the Bible more closely, but not sure how to do that at the moment (beyond doing it during cg etc.)

yup that's roughly it haha. you all can pray for my exams too! have been very busy with my theatre studies practical exam so i've hardly begun studying (SERIOUSLY) so yeah pray for good time management. :)

thanks!

Isaiah 29-30

2007-11-19T14:43:00.000+08:00

Unlike previously where I shared that I was wasting my time away doing pointless activities (or nothing), things have really picked up since then. I have been learning quite a bit about God and am real excited to continue knowing more about Him =). (Reason why I have not penned down my thoughts here or updated the RAFT blog is because I am still trying to chew and digest many of the things I have read)

It's really been helpful thinking about God in a more intellectual sense as it has helped shape a few paradigms, aided me in coming up with what’s my stand on certain issues and allowed me to appreciate God more. (Reminder to self; let’s not get carried away with stimulating ourselves intellectually and forget about using our heart to feel and listen to God and vice-versa. I personally have neglected the deeper intellectual dimension for a quite while)

Anyway I shan’t bore you all those supposedly “more intellectual” thoughts (which very likely would seem rudimentary to you, the reader) with my inability to expresses such things concisely and with clarity. Hence I shall share some thoughts that apply more directly to my life.

Before I proceed with the actual sharing, let me note that something read from the bible that seems to have some link to what we may be experiencing does not equate to an exact interpretation / explanation of the current situation. Though are many times when God has used His word from the bible to deal with my ongoing situation head-on, we must always be wary of not interpreting the word to suit our circumstances despite our predilection to draw links between the two. We must always evaluate the word with minds, heart and most importantly the spirit as “his anointing (the spirit) teaches you (us) about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit – 1 John 2:27”. Having mulled over the word, I would like to make it clear that the bible passages (Isaiah 29-30) that I will be referring is something that God has used to teach and deal with me personally and by using these passages, I am not trying to imply that they represent the current state of affairs.

The reason why I must emphasize the above is because I will be using Isaiah 29-30 to relate to the small brouhaha in the Youth Ministry of recent, and what I feel God has impressed on my heart in all humility. The chapters taken from Isaiah talk about the time before the siege of Jerusalem by Sennacherib. Thus what I have been painstakingly trying to put across is that our YM is not under any siege by the parents and verses such as Isaiah 29:24 (“… those who complain will accept instruction.”) are not an allusion to them in any way. With that aside I hope I can now proceed with my sharing without causing any misunderstanding freely.

Amongst the many lessons I got out from these passages which I found so enriching, I shall take out 4 points.

Formalities
Isaiah 29:13 “The Lord says: “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men.”

Worship of God pertains to the whole spectrum of living our lives but for the sake of brevity I shall focus on the corporate worship session at church. I am the sort of person who believes (and still striving to be such a person) that when we worship, we should put all formalities and opinions of others around us aside; let’s lift our voices, dance, raise our hands, kneel, cry… whatever God inspires us to do as we use all of our heart, body soul and mind to reach out to Him.

My initial mindset usually relates “rules taught by men” as those sort worship sessions where some people feels it’s their obligation to give the very solemn (sometimes pained and glum) look, remain very still as if they were part of a marching contingent, etc. Just to clarify, I am not trying to criticize such worships; I truly believe that God looks at the heart above all.

But on the flip-side, could our “rules taught by men” now be the raising of hands, jumping etc.? Do we think to ourselves, “Oh the music is starting to build up; time to start raising hands” or “This is the sort of song where everyone jumps so I ought to join in”? Our outwardly exuberant appearances and postures of worship are of no significance if our “hearts are far from” God.

Moreover, this more visible expression of worship could be a greater stumbling block to others. Imagine if our friends/parents see us worshipping God with all these outward expressions but do not see the change in our hearts when we leave the worship hall. I am sure that would cause a lot of doubts to fill their minds vis-à-vis our reasons for worshipping in such a manner, hence giving some parents an added reason to speculate and raise concerns.

In a rather crude way of putting it across, I sometimes would rather people look as if they were mannequins if their attitudes for worshipping were wrong and if they do not let their experience with God transform their lives lest outsides conclude that God was not working through the lives of others who were worshipping God with all their might.

This being said, I also hope the contrary does not happen where people think, “My life is such a mess, I am not worthy to give my all in worship to God today or else others may think I am a hypocrite.” Do not be discouraged if you do not find yourself turning into a saint after the worship session. Instead, having examined our hearts, let us endeavor to give everything we have to Him in worship despite how distant we may seem from God. Allow the Holy Spirit to convict and empower us to change our lives. I believe that there will definitely be a change in one’s life if we continually do so, if not, let’s re-examine our lives.

Just as we worship in song with all our might, live the life He wants us to live with all our might.

(Due to time constraints, I think I shall stop here for now. I hope what was written did not come out as gibberish. And if there any parts inappropriate I should remove please do tell me. Thanks.)

Pray! :)

2007-11-18T22:10:00.000+08:00

ok... it's so typical right? things start out vibrantly at first and then it begins to die down. i think shu may owes one now. someone pls remind her :P

but anyway, i'm actually supposed to be studying for my exams but i got a bit bored so thought to share how youth was like for me yesterday.

as i was telling darf during the morning prayer, i was quite apprehensive about the service coz err, i'm the pessimistic type. haha. but ya, i felt quite unsettled about it in the morning. was praying before prac but still had no peace but that's maybe also coz i dramatise things too much in my mind and i imagine the worse. i was afraid that things would go badly in that the tension between the parents and the ym would get worse and everything would go downhill. i was afraid that because of this, God would turn away from us and we'll be back to square zero again but thankfully, along the way, i felt better about things. haha. but yes. for me, service was quite incredible. when pastor told us to get on our knees, it really felt right and God's presence was so strong upon me then and it was at that moment when i was reminded again, that really, it's God who matters. ok la, coz actually, i was feeling quite bleah about a grade that i got for an essay. it really discouraged me coz i thought that this sem would be a really good sem grades-wise and the B will jeopardize those hopes for sure. ok. i know it sounds very silly but i'm quite a grade-oriented person and yeah, while on my knees, the thought just came to me, the B means nothing in light of Him. which is so true of course and ya la, i have to keep looking to Him for my studies and not depend on my own strength or wisdom and all that. He has wrought a greater miracle in the past when somehow, my B- for the CA got pulled up to B+ for the final grade. it is really incredible, especially since i really thought i wrote rubbish but yeah, God works. just must trust Him :)

and k la. a more trivial thing. basically, i'm not the sort to jump during worship. or anything for that matter. i think :P i don't the sensation of all the fats bobbing and somehow, i have no timing when i jump to music. i tried it before and i was quite out of time. haha. and i'll get tired very easily and i'll feel silly for starting but yesterday was incredible. it felt like His joy so filled my heart that i just had to and i did and it felt so liberating. plus, i didn't feel the super fats bobbing and i jumped to the timing and i didn't feel tired. in fact, it was so rejuvenating. so yeah. haha. so ya la, that's more like personal sharing.

but can pray for my exams!!! i have a paper this sat at 9 am which is why i won't be in church for prac but i'll come at about 11 plus after my paper la. it's called woman's reproductive health and well, i'm not good at science. it's mcq but i don't know if there's negative marking and yeah, can pray that i'll do well! :) i won't be greedy la. B+ and i'll be over the moon :)

oh. and yes, keep praying for the ym! and the parents and for revival to come! and for the camp too! :)

2007-11-07T22:29:00.001+08:00

gosh ok i think like none of us have been following the 'fortnightly' rule. cuz i think we post almost once a weeek
ok. this week so far has been rather...relaxed..spiritually wise, it's been up & down.
some worrying stuff came up and its been rather bad... but then happy stuff happened too! so yeah.

and um. yeah currently some of the stuff that i've been thinking about.
is actually about the heart for God.

To me.. the heart for God is really something i long for. and i suppose everyone does too... And, i suppose that us, in the music min. need to have a heart for God at all times (duh). And not to be proud/narcissistic.

But what i've been thinking is that.. do I really have a heart for God..?
i mean like sometimes i can't really tell seriously.
And the thing that caused me to start thinking about this, was when Euclid told me

euclid said:tian yi, it was a heart of wanting to serve the Lord that now pleases Him, with the same heart offer it unto the Lord everyday and you shall have favour from heaven above.

um yeah so after that.. i thought to myself... do i really have a heart for God?
When i looked back at the initial reason for why i joined the music min... i was really confused.
My initial reason to join the music min was to.. kinda like make new friends in church. and was partly because i wanted to learn an instrument.

I doubt those reasons had something to do with God.
so yeah i'm kinda in a..questionable state right now i suppose. i mean.
I used to be the kind of boy that doesn't care about God.. and ever since i joined the music min. i met friends like Dan,nana,joel,min wei. ben etc etc.
then I started going for 2nd service.. and started opening my heart out to God during youth.

And now. after all the stuff that i've been through (gifts, annointings, Spiritual healings)
Sometimes i still ask myself if im practicing my drum parts so hard because i wanna please God.
or please the friends that i have.

so....yah i'm still pondering over that and asking God to change my heart. if it needs changing...

gosh i'm having such a hard time practicing 'break free' (goes off the practice)

at the cross

2007-11-07T09:48:00.000+08:00

hi all,

i wanna share something that God has been reminding me recently: the cross of Christ.

i think that at times, we lose sight of what the cross means, we do not have adequate understanding of what it took for Jesus to die for us. u know at easter or good friday when they always show the excerpt from the 'Jesus' film where He's being crucified? and it's a gut wrenching 3 mins that i always turn my face from because i can't bear the sight of it and the anguish and all that? yeah. i think maybe that isn't very right, a refusal to be confronted with the violence He had to suffer on the cross just so i won't be so squeamish about it and yet at the same time, being desensitized to His saving work.

anyway, so i've been reading from 'my utmost for His highest,' great book, very uplifting but can be quite heavy going but anyway, some excerpts i wanna share since this guy writes really forcefully. the context is that God doesn't forgive us for our sins based on His great love. He forgives our sin based on the cross and the author calls us to meditate on the power of the cross, not the negate the price Jesus had to pay to reconcile us to God.

so yes, excerpts:

'But the conviction of sin by the Holy Spirit blots out every relationship on earth and makes us aware of only one- 'Against you, you only, have I sinned...' (psalm 51:4)... The great miracle of the grace of God is that He forgives sin, and it is in the death of Jesus Christ alone that enables the divine nature to forgive and remain true to itself in doing so. It is shallow nonsense to say that God forgives us because He is love. Once we have been convicted of sin, we will never say this again. The love of God is spelled out on the cross and nowhere else... Forgiveness doesn't merely mean that that i am saved from hell and have been made ready for heaven... Forgiveness means that i am forgiven into a newly created relationship which identifies me with God in Christ. The miracle of redemption is that God turns me, the unholy one, into the standard of himself, the Holy One. He does this by putting into me a new nature, the nature of Christ.' - Nov 19

'The only basis on which God can forgive us is the tremendous tragedy of the Cross of Christ. To base our forgiveness on any other ground is unconscious blasphemy. The only ground on which God can forgive our sin and reinstate us to His favour is through the cross of Christ. There is no other way! Forgiveness, which is so easy for us to accept, cost the agony at Calvary. We should never take the forgiveness of sin, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and take our sanctification in simple faith, and then forget the enormous cost to God that made it all of ours… Compared with the miracle of the forgiveness of sin, the experience of sanctification is small. Sanctification is simply the wonderful expression or evidence of the forgiveness of sins in a human life. But the thing that awakens the deepest fountain of gratitude in a human being is that God has forgiven his sin… Once you realise all that it cost God to forgive you, you will be held as in a vice, constrained by the love of God.' - Nov 20

no need to rush through what i've typed out... take time to ponder, reflect and ask God to give u a fresh understanding of the cross. during communion on sunday, i asked for that, i asked Him to help me imagine the sufferings on the cross for my sin and i was touched by His great sacrifice all over again. don't be afraid to reflect coz of fears that He will be waiting to deal with u about a particular sin or whatever. he disciplines because we are His children. be proud to be called His child.

On the RAFT blog

2007-11-07T00:19:00.000+08:00

Hi,

I have sort of posted my spiritual update, dated 7 Nov 07 on the RAFT blog. There's other stuff to share but yep, shall see whether I have the time to do so. (Yes I do have things to do too for all you cynics out there =p!)

Some post...

2007-11-04T22:14:00.000+08:00

Today is indeed a very gloomy evening. But no matter. So everyone is feeling fine? Any prayer requests anyone?

Yeah I just want to share about my classmate whom I mentioned in the post earlier. I talked to his parents about the Youth Camp today and his parents were positive about it! Praise God!!!!

Today I done a passage in Exodus 4:1-5. I feel that God is telling me in the passage that He will keep us from harm, but it is up to us to believe Him. Personally I feel that this passage is relevant to me as I got attacked spiritually in cyberspace. (Josh should know about this) Yeah I think that God will protect His people, like He protected the Israelites from attacks and other stuff. So we gotta rely on Him and trust that He will deliver us.

Another point I want to share is in 2 Kings 4:1-7. It is the part where Elisha helps a widow pay off her debts by everlasting oil. The widow asked her sons to get as many jars as they can find. In verse 5, however, the widow asked her sons to find more jars as she realised that there were still leftover oil. I think, from this passage, it says that God gives everlasting supplies. But if you limit your field of vision, God can only give you this much. Let me give an example. During a test on your dreaded subject (in my case, chinese), you are trusting God for great results. But, in the back of your mind you believe that "Hey, I suck at xxx subject. I trust God, yes, but... I trust he'll give me a pass at the most." then He will give you a pass, since you expected it. But if you entirely trust Him (work is still needed on this part) and your mindset is"Ok, God, I'll attempt xxx subject. I FULLY trust in You, for Your will be done, not mine." I believe God will give you what you desire. Of course it must co-incide with His will.

That's about all I gotta share... I'm feeling pretty weird... Anyway, have a goodnight sleep!!!

God bless everyone who read this,
Yong Quan

breadcrumbs

2007-10-31T21:59:00.000+08:00

hello everyone!

i've decided to take pink! because that's my favourite colour (and NO, i'm not a bimbo). hahaha.

anyway, thanks to tianyi for coming up with this cool blog! i'm just curious.. why "valleybythesea"? any special significance?

okay tonight is my massive blogging day. hmm for what has been really bugging me this week, go check out my recent post on RAFT. it's really long, i'm sorry, but i'm a lit student :D

so now that you've all read that, let me share on how my spiritual life has been recently. i thank God that it has really picked up ever since the last worship set i led around a month ago, and even though sometimes i still get bogged down by work and worry (i'm human after all), God has given me the grace to stand under trials (1 Corinthians 10:13)

actually a few months' ago i was quite sad over my QT state, because for some reason i could never seem to spend more than 20min doing QT. and that's such a pathetic amount of time when you consider how those great men of faith like "Praying Hyde", J.O. Fraser can spend hours reading the Bible and praying. (go check out their stories! very inspiring). but anyway i left it at that because i thought that well, it's the quality and not the quantity that counts.

but the cool thing is that this week, as i started on my "Observations - Interpretations - Applications" thing, God has graciously helped me to spend even more time with Him! now i try to write down my prayer requests for each day, and it has really helped. i've become more focused in my prayers, and seeing how God answers (sometimes almost instantly) is really exciting. and for me, i just like the thrill of digging into His Word on my own and discovering things for myself. as i always believe, His Word was not written for the smart, but for lay people like us. so we can never say that we don't "understand", because we've the best Teacher at hand to give us insights :)

so, back to why this post is titled "breadcrumbs". i was thinking of the parable in Matthew 15:21-28 that Elder Edwin shared during his sermon on sunday. i think his message on prayer was very timely for me because i've been guilty of not praying enough. especially since there's the whole Christmas thing coming up, i really really need to pray and let God work! so the sermon was both a rebuke as well as a challenge to trust God with my plans.

i'm still very intrigued by the parable above because i feel like i'm just scratching the surface only, but anyway, the thing that stood out most for me is the level of FAITH AND HUMILITY that the woman had. she was willing to accept anything from God, because she knew that these "anything"s would become valuable simply because of the status of the Person who had thrown it down. how do i explain it? for me, the challenge lies in believing that whatever "crumbs" God might throw down into my life (i.e. supposedly bad things), they are actually GOOD FOR ME. and they are good not because they possess any inherent worth, but because the Person who threw it down (i.e. God) is wise, loving, kind, understanding etc.

i hope i managed to get that point across haha. so anyway, i guess this can be extrapolated to the youth ministry too. we are allowed to pray for good things, but we shouldn't start sulking when we get "lemons" instead. because God knows what's best, what's TIMELY, and we should really trust Him more in this aspect.

i've so much more to share! but must be focused haha. so that's all for this post, i'll pray and see if God prompts me to share more another day. for now, prayer request!

pray for the children's homes to reply me with POSITIVE answers by this friday. canossaville has already replied to say that they'll be closed and their Christmas schedule is already packed, so that's a closed door. i'm quite worried, naturally, but yes just trying to trust God with this :)

okay this blog is a fantastic idea because it indulges my propensity to be longwinded! hahaha. have a great week everyone :)

read your comments

2007-10-31T13:58:00.000+08:00

hey guys (once again),

pls read the comments at the end of your postings coz it's ya, my response to what u've written and all that. it's quite hard keeping in touch with people constantly and stuff so i'm gonna try to do so here in cyber land. haha. let's use this place to encourage one another ok? that's quite the point anyway. haha.

wow

2007-10-31T09:29:00.000+08:00

hey guys... (since it's only the guys who have posted thus far :P)

i'm really encouraged to read your postings, especially josh's. thanks for sharing so much. i'm actually supposed to be working on my essay now but ah, decided to take a break and write a bit about how my walk has been as well :)

hmm. one reason why i'm so on about having this blog is that we all have something to look back to, a description of the times when things are good or bad in whatever sense of the word and we see how God has brought us through. basically, this blog is sorta an enforced kind of journal entry thing? haha. enforced coz everyone (in the ymm comm) is supposed to blog at least once in 2 weeks as a sorta mutual accountability thing.

ok. personally, i'm so excited and encouraged about what God is doing in the ym. i don't think i've ever prayed so faithfully and fervently about the ym before! haha, yes, confession :P but it's so cool to be seeing people who have in the past, looked completely nonchalant, getting to their feet in excitement and praising God. of course, i don't know how personal spiritual walks are but yeah, personally, i find it hard to worship God in vibrancy and truth when my contentment is not found in Him. so yeah, let's keep praying and seeking for more of God's fire and passion in our ministry. i remember joel sharing during prayer meeting that apathy, like passion spreads fast too and well, let's distinguish all apathy with the passion God has poured and is pouring into our lives ya? :)

and let's remember to pray for those who haven't been coming too. there're probably some people whom God has put upon your heart coz of your relationship with the person or coz the person used to be so passionate about God but has somehow slipped away. let's pray for those lost sheep as well, even as we pray for the current sheep in the pen and those that have yet to know the Shepherd.

i'm reading Isaiah now and i'm loving it. both on the literary appreciation level and the spiritual level. haha. i just wanna share something that was so cool for me yesterday:

it's a sort of warning i guess... but eh, Isaiah is full of judgments and stuff actually although it is interspersed by passages of hope, repentance, forgiveness, God's favour and all that. but yes...

Isaiah 5

The Song of the Vineyard

1 I will sing for the one I love
a song about his vineyard:
My loved one had a vineyard
on a fertile hillside.

2 He dug it up and cleared it of stones
and planted it with the choicest vines.
He built a watchtower in it
and cut out a winepress as well.
Then he looked for a crop of good grapes,
but it yielded only bad fruit.

3 "Now you dwellers in Jerusalem and men of Judah,
judge between me and my vineyard.

4 What more could have been done for my vineyard
than I have done for it?
When I looked for good grapes,
why did it yield only bad?

5 Now I will tell you
what I am going to do to my vineyard:
I will take away its hedge,
and it will be destroyed;
I will break down its wall,
and it will be trampled.

6 I will make it a wasteland,
neither pruned nor cultivated,
and briers and thorns will grow there.
I will command the clouds
not to rain on it."

basically, what struck me was that it's natural to expect a good harvest from good seeds. that should be how it is what. and ok, i cheated a bit here by searching the concordance but whilst reading, i was reminded about how WE are God's seeds:

1 Peter 1: 23
'For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God.'

and yeah, it's the whole idea of how we are His children and we're called to bear good fruit and the judgment that follows if we keep deliberately disobeying him is that the barriers that surrounds us for protection will be removed (v5) and that there will be nothing to distinguish us from the rest of the world if we keep insisting on following its ways (v6). i know this might sound scary and harsh but well, the disconcerting passage in Revelations says the same thing:

Revelation 3:15-17

'I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. You say, 'I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.' But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked.'

if u read on in Isaiah 5, there's mention about the acquisition of wealth for hoarding's sake and stuff so the passage above isn't out of context or what but hmm. in a more positive light, the passage from Isaiah reminds us that we are born of God through the blood of Christ, that we are

1 Peter 2:9
'... a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.'

ok la. i need to get back to my essay :P but yeah, on a more encouraging and inspiring note,

the Lord 'will be a shelter and shade from the heat of the day, and a refuge and hiding place from the storm and rain.' (Isaiah 4:6)

i wonder who bothered to read through till the end :P haha.

THIS IS TIANYI'S POST HA

2007-10-30T12:07:00.001+08:00

yay well im here to post again. so im free from any people/person who will chase me to post.

This weeks been..ok so so sometimes i cant feel God sometimes i can...
and um yea. Thank God for helping me with my retest though. even when i didn't study(not that im proud of it)
and the paper was relatively doable
(is there such a word? i think its like.. Do-able..like able to do it or something)

ANYWAY... yah so thats my weeeek. oh no theres so much rain.

Prayer requests

2007-10-23T18:56:00.000+08:00

Hey guys, i know im supposed to share about my spiritual life etc. but i kinda got an urgent prayer request...
The classmate I'm witnessing to is interested to go for the camp but his parents are TOTALLY against Christianity... Yeah, he told me that his parents immediately stated NO when he asked his parents about the Transformers Camp... So I suppose we could pray for him. Conviction does not come from us, though, it comes from the Holy Spirit. Yeah and about my spiritual walk...
Not as long as Josh... xP but I think that it is pretty... ok in that sense... but I'm still trying to understand Pastor Adrian's message... Yeah and I "feel" that God is doing something mighty in the Youth Ministry and Satan is trying to fight back. Hard. So we could keep praying for the Youth Ministry, for Pastor as he is ministering to us and the apparent devil attack shown in Priscilla. But we believe God can do anything amen? And remember to pray for our classmates/ collegues/students/friends/slaves etc. that God will appear to them and they will see the LIGHT!!! Yeah and we gotta pray for each other. Cos the devil kinda hates us all... So we gotta make a stand and kick the devil in the butt when he comes to tempt us. Of course we cannot do it by our own strength. God is the only one who can strengthen us divine-ly to stand guard against the devil attacks. In Ephesians 6:14-18, Paul is talking about the armor of God. This verse kinda stands out to me.
"And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints" Eph 6:18
Not only must we put on the armor of God, we gotta praying in the Spirit. Oh yah, the armor of God, in summary, is...
-Belt of Truth
-Breastplate of Righteousness
-Shoes filled with the Gospel of peace. (need some help interpreting this part)
-Shield of Faith
-Helmet of Salvation
-Sword of the Spirit.
I suppose these "items" can help us against devil attacks... Right? Hehe...

Another part I want to share about is in 2 Peter 2:1-22. To summarise it up, it is talking about false teachers during the end times. (which is about now... I think). Yeah so looking around, it seems kinda true right? All these talk about evolution and other stuff. They are all out to stop the Truth from spreading. I just wanna share this point so that we can all be geared up and ready for the next blow the devil will send. Cos if we are doing all these (serving in the Youth Ministry... different areas) in God's will (which I believe we all are) then the devil will go out to all odds to try to stop us, in terms of circumstances, emotional issues etc. I mean, when you tell someone secular about the Good News (generally, from what I've seen) they will think you are some kinda weirdo and they do not want to have anything to do with you. During Pastor's message on Sunday, he mentioned about righteous anger. It is frustrating right, seeing a lotta people rejecting the Good News. Ok lar, from what my classmates were telling me, they just cannot believe that Christ died for us. Christ died for us cos He loves us right?
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" Romans 5:8
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus" Romans 3:23-24
Yeah, just want to end off with these few verses...
"For he himself is our peace, who has made the two one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility" Ephesians 3:11
"You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised"Hebrews 10:36
"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you" 2 Peter 5:7

Yup... that's about all I have to share today.
God bless all of you amen,
Yong Quan

P.S this is abt 2 month's worth of... stuff

2007-10-22T22:47:00.000+08:00

okay! my spiritual walk huh!
well. i've been on spiritual high for this whole week.
and um partly cuz of the rusty event.
but seriously man! its kinda cool! cuz i feel really really excited about our youth now. and all the cool stuff that's been happening to the sec 1's... well. mostly the girls but aye!
and..hm well im like so ready to go RAAR RAAR for youth now! i think i know how ben feels :D

and yup! THATS ALL TONIGHT
YOU KNOW WHOSE BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW?
ok you're wouldnt know anyway hahaha;D

1st Post

2007-10-22T06:12:00.000+08:00

Yay!

I get to be the first person to post on the new Youth Music Ministry (YMM) Blog!!! gosh, there are now so many blogs around these days it's hard to keep up with all of them.

To recapitulate (if my memory does not fail me), some of the functions of this blog is to allow persons in the YMM to:

a) Share their spiritual lives (both in good times and struggles)
b) Give words of encouragement / edifying comments
c) Thanksgiving
d) Any other issues pertaining to the YMM

Yep, the above are just a few purposes of the blog and in no way should the blog be limited to them.

Anyway, so I'm suppose to share how things are going for me spiritually. As of today things are still going really swell. God has really been ministering to me through QT, the services and i'm really just amazed by how God is moving in the YM and I am so encouraged by the young people's passion for God (I managed to read some of their blogs today).

However, having said that, we must be extra cautious and careful of attacks from the devil as Adrian and Minwei have shared. It's so easy to feel hyped up for now especially when you hear so many people getting excited for God and expecting really big things to happen. But what would our reaction be when people around us show signs of losing their passion or those "big things" don't come to pass as we thought they would be. I have experienced such things happening in my life and I must confess that they have discouraged me greatly at times.

I still remember when we were all praying for Pris to be completely healed by a certain date but when it did not happen my faith was shaken. However, looking back at that whole saga, I am actually glad it happened because it increased my faith eventually, gave me a more initmate understanding of God being the master of every situation and thought me alot about seeking God for ourselves (big thanks to Ben & Vincent for their sharings here).

Having said the above, I'm not trying to say that we should not expect big things from God lest we feel greater discouragement. Neither am I saying that I have doubts that God is going to do something really awesome (He already is doing such amazing things and I bet there's more to come =)!). But yep, this is just a reminder to myself to be continually vigilant in these areas because I for one usually get very discouraged when I see friends back-slide and feel a sense of guilt that I didn't do more.

Believing in my own abilities and efforts to make things "work" for God is still an area which I struggle in and it's because of this I get easily discouraged when things don't work out as I want them to be. It's especially dangerous when I deceive myself into believing that I've given God control by doing spiritual things when actually I am focussing more on the acts I've done instead of God. For example:"Hey God. I've prayer so many times, I've fasted so much, I've done my QT, I've spent so much time preparing for worship but yet you don't seem to be working!".

Think God has really been continually dealing with me in this area and the more I am willing to let God take control and change my attitude it's amazing how things work out and even when they don't seem to work out that spirit of discouragement is no longer there.

As we look to God to send us revival, there may be times when negative things come our way. Let us not lose track of all the things our God has done and can do and will do because of some discouraging issues. Instead, lets continue to place all our trust in our Saviour, committing everything into His hands.